Welcome to Gaia! :: View User's Journal | Gaia Journals

because you are a living human being going through your teenage years, and you've been hurt in many ways that are sometimes beyond explaning. perhaps you are empty because you are used to the journey towards what you want. perhaps you hate the people you are surrounded by because they can not show the same care towards you. perhaps it hurts to smile because the world is not smiling, and that brings you back down. perhaps you feel useless becasue you have not found your purpose yet. perhaps people are hurt in your presence becasue they envy you. perhaps you feel like you're lying because you are lying to yourself. perhaps you have hatred because you envy others. perhaps you want to be somewhere else because you think of yourself this way. perhaps you [think you] act stupid becasue you are ashamed of what you've done in certain situations, even though you might not be able to see that that was probably a good thing. perhaps you feel in the way becasue that's what you've told yourself, and you believe it. perhaps you feel your mind slipping because you have been contemplating all of this. perhaps you [think you] cause pain becasue you have seen other's reactions, and misunderstood. perhaps you feel duality in yourself because that's who you are right now. perhaps you feel dead becasue all of this weighs upon your mind and preys upon your soul.. and you don't kow what else to call it. perhaps you are loved, and you just don't realise it. perhaps you are someone's everything, but you are letting all of the negatives in, and shutting all the positives out. perhaps you make someone smile, and give someone a reason, and heal someone in your presence, and take away someone's pain, and keep them alive...

but then again, perhaps i just don't exhist.
i love you. what's wrong...? or rather... why did you post this?

I guess this world is just full of whys, huh?

Listen, I can relate. I know what it's like...to feel useless...dead. If you ever want to talk, I'm here. No matter how cheesey and fake it sounds, I'm not just saying things to try and make you feel as if your not alone, but you aren't alone. Every why up there, I've asked myself as well. If you want, I can try to help. Just puuting it out there. Y'know...just in case 'n all... redface