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I cut up all his things... I feel bad for my stupidity and my rash thinking. I feel like so bad, I'm been wanting to vomit for the last two days. I feel so little headed. I don't know what I'm doing or where I'm going. My body hurts and the red sky hangs over me and I'm still searching. I can't find it... I can't find my blue skies. He was my blue sky and I pushed him away... I'm so miserable.