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"I don't know what to do anymore. I will do everything he asks of me but after what he said I just don't even know what to think. I love him so much and I try so hard to make things work but both him and I keep working ourselves so thin. He actslike I have aproblem with his friends and I don't I have friends just like he does. I guess I really am needy but I'm not as bad as I was and I know that. I'm probly just not going to call him anymore because he is busy every time I get a hold of him. I don't want it to be wrong to want to be with him but he acts like it is. I think what is hurting me the most right now is the fact that he was craving someone else. I'm really not sure what to do about that other then try and hold back my tears because crying isn't going to make that though dissaper. I don't know what to do. I hurt really bad and I know it's not nearly as much as he's hurting right now because honestly he is more capable of enduring pain then I am but it doesn't mean I'm perfectly fine. The thing is I just want to make him happy so that he can trust me when I tell him I'll do something or stop doing something. I really would do anything for him. If he asked me to find a way to get to davis or hollywood I would I would be there as soon as I could. I've let him down so much and he always forgives me for it but I don't think I'll ever forgive myself for all the pain I put him through."

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