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Listen, I'm going to be honest with you. Being the Supreme Overlord of the Entire Universe and Perhaps a Little Beyond Because Who Knows Where the Boundaries of Reality as We Know It End is kind of exhausting.

I mean, the paperwork.

Do you have any idea how many times a day I put my signature on important documents? How many times I have to sacrifice a traitor to ensure I sign everything with the blood of my enemies?

My most trusted Squirrel Generals tell me it must be so nice being me. All of the parties and compliments. The fear and admiration. The blood-soaked offerings laid upon my altars. I must admit those things are nice, but what does it matter if I'm just. so. bored. all the time?

In my youth, I fought my boredom with conquest. The screams of my enemies as I tore down the walls of their cities and bathed the streets with the blood of those who dared defy me. My squirrel army was undefeatable. We razed towns. Conquered kingdoms. Burned whole continents in our search for expansion. For victory! When my appetite was sated, it was only days before I felt the itch again in my blood. I needed to feast upon victory. Consume it. I was an empty vessel waiting to be filled with the spoils of war.

And yet here I sit. At a desk. Writing something so inane as a journal entry all because I was so incredibly good.

At conquering. Not, like, as a person. I'm a literal nightmare of evil.

But I was just so good at burning and looting that I conquered it all. All of it. Everything. And maybe a little beyond that. There is nothing left for me to do now except sign my name on edicts and write journal entries.

Anyway.

I don't know where I was going with this. So I'll just... sign off.

Supreme Overlord of ******** Everything, I guess