I know that no one ever comes to read my journal so if you're there I guess you get to see lot's of venting that I couldn't share with even the people I consider friends...
here it goes...
Dear Journal yeah right.
let's just say that being ignored isn't the best feeling in the world... those people around me that I cherish tell me about their problems. and I'm ok with that. They just dont know how much what they say hurts... they tell me about how they look at someone and just can't get their attention...you got my attention. They tell me how others are ignoring you...I'm not ignoring you. They tell me how they love to be best friends with someone... I'm right here wanting a best friend. They tell me how the other person is always looking away as if you're a burden...I waiting here and trying to take all your burdens. They tell me they feel like the third wheel... can you even imagine how I feel...
Are they sending me the message that I'm not good enough or what...?
Everyone thinks that I've got my life in order...my act together...cause I'm always smiling. I only smile to make you smile. What am I thinking behing the mask... what do you care...?
knowing that no one really ever looks in here...no none ever sends me the email or pm or im first without me starting it... am I just totally irrelevant... or not the best. Or just an emothinal boost to get to ther top... 'cause no one wants to settle for less... am I less?
I love those people who haven't made me feel this way... offering me their love, time, and attention.
Joy H. Emily L. Jenny M. Lynnli W. Kat M. Michelle L. Stephanie J. ~<3
You never make me feel unneeded and you're always there to get me past these days... I thank God for you over and over again. And I'll know I can keep smiling for these people. Look after me kindly...
~ heart
RastelxX · Wed Sep 19, 2007 @ 10:56pm · 1 Comments |