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All that b*tching and whining has paid off. After putting up with a lot of things, I can safely say I'm going to college

UC Berkeley: xd heart
UCLA: xd heart
UCSD: xd
UC Davis: xd
UC Irvine: xd
Bowdoin: xd
Trinity College (CT): xd xd (I didn't finish their application.)
Georgetown: gonk
Harvard: gonk
Stanfurd: ?

UC Berkeley Men's Octet - Oompa Loompa Parody

Click there, scroll down to the UC Berkeley Men's Octet and DOWNLOAD this SONG! (Especially if you want to go to Stanfurd!)

Oh Glorious....oompa loompas are wonderful, teehee.

Anyway, the main point of this entry, as short and sweet (or as long...) as it may be, is to say that I'm so fed up with college applications. Ever day, without a doubt, my mom comes home or wakes up to say something along the lines of, "You have failed to finish a college application today. You really should have done this months ago when you had time, instead of waiting until the last minute to do them. I'm really disappointed." Then she'll continue with the content of my application, "In this essay, you need to talk about this more. You need to write better. I don't understand your writing. What does this mean? You always tell me how you write well, how you do so good in English. But this is crap, why can't you translate your writing ability? This is the most important thing you'll ever write in your life!"

Beautiful huh? And then it seems, my self esteem starts to plummet. And I REALLY don't want to do college essays because I know they're going to be shitty. And even if they aren't, even if I'm being unrealistic, even if I'm exaggerating, I'll still feel like I'm not going to get into the schools that I'm applying to and especially the ones I want to go to. Quite unfortunate I have such a bleak outlook.

But my friend got into Columbia Early Decision. I'm so freaking proud of her, it's awesome. She's been raving about going since Freshman year. For her to get in is pretty amazing. Yet here's the thing I have to think about. How do I compare to her? How does my application look against her's?

I personally think I'm not good enough for an Ivy. There's nothing special about me. Sure I get good grades, relatively decent SAT scores, extracurriculars of all varieties. But seriously, there's nothing SPECIAL about me that makes me STAND OUT. Granted, you don't need something to make you stand out to get into a good school, but it helps. I don't know. Knowing she got into Columbia makes me have a little more hope that I'll get into a good school. But the top two, Harvard and Stanford, I really doubt, really really reallly doubt. (Not that I want to go to Stanford anyway.) We'll see what happens. I unfortunately don't get to hear from schools until March and April because I couldn't apply Early anywhere (for various reasons which I will not go into further detail).

So enough of that. Too much complaining on my part. But there's just so much going on in my life...I need a place to vent because I know other people won't listen to me. Back to the college application essays. They're just so much fun...

On the Ellen DeGeneres show the other day, they showed posters for new Dove commercials (the soap).

#1) *picture of old lady with grey hair* Grey or Gorgeous?
#2) *picture of plus sized model* Overweight or Outstanding?
#3) *picture of really old woman* Wrinkled or Wonderful?

Today, I feel beautiful.

I feel a rant coming on...about NO CARBS (aka No Cheney, Ashcroft, Rumsfeld, or Bush...and definitely no Rice!) and the Atkins diet in general...when I have more time, this entry will be editted... Until then, I keep you in suspense!

Respect- it's a word we've all heard over and over and yet, many of us still don't "get it."

What is respect?

<b>re-spect</b>
<i>tr. v.</i> to feel or show deferential regard for; esteem
<i>n.</i> willingness to show consideration or appreciation; the state of being regarded with honor or esteem

I have to say there is a lack of respect in American culture today, not just from the "distrespectful obnoxious teenager" but also from the scholarly uprighteous adults.

I think the biggest problem I have right now is that so many "open-minded" individuals are not willing to listen to those of us who are trying to fight stereotypes.

Take for example, my friends and I are a part of a national organization to get teens interested in politics, government, and debate. If that's not the polar opposite of the average apathetic teenager, I don't know what is. (That was cliche...sorry sweatdrop )

So when my AP Lit teacher cuts me off while we're having a discussion, that makes me pretty frustrated.

Let me explain the situtaion: We were discussion the forms of art, high art and low art. We were talking about the content of rap and how that specifically qualifies rap as low art, not just because the art came from the ghetto which is typically of a lower class. We brought up the Harlem Renaissance which revolutionized art as we know it. We talked about how jazz used ot be considered a lower art. We talked about the evolution of art and music.

This brought about the question of whether art climbs the ladder or society reverts to primative eras? This somehow got into body piercing and what the media today advocates. My teacher was firmly opposed to the trend of society towards a lower class, and a "lesser" culture. She wondered if the slow degradation of the middle class was saying something about our society...

I piped up. Of course I did, when don't I rag on the media when I get a chance? Exactly. (: I raised my hand and began by saying, "Part of the rise of these trends in the mainstream is because teens, at this age, are easily molded and need to feel the acceptance. Our culture is about acceptance." I would like to have commented further saying, "I firmly disagree with the morals and values proposed by much of the American public today. It's not just about what's cool, or what's in...there's an element of culture that says being lower class is okay, being unintelligent is wonderful, we can revert back to the unenlightened era. Whether it's a ploy by the upper class in power to gain more control, who knows..."

But I never got that chance. In agreeing with her, but justifying the opposition, I was never able to fully express my view. And I was so incredibly angered by it. She cut me off, saying, "Do you HONESTLY believe that it's about fashion? I mean, come on. If everyone in the world was piercing or forking their tongue...would you do it? I most certainly would not!" Naturally, I again said thought under my breath, "Of course not." But at that time...it was all worthless. She had burst out at me, and called on someone else in the class to off opinion.

I. Was. Pissed.

As a teacher, you really don't do that to students. You don't make your students feel like s**t. You're supposed to help them, you're supposed to nurture them. I'm not saying we need to be coddled, but we certainly shouldn't be put down. We KNOW you're much more intelligent that we are, and maybe that we will ever be. That doesn't mean you can use your intelligence as a weapon. And you certainly should NOT expect think in the exact same way. Yes, we are capable of intelligent thought processes and conversation. But we're students! We're still learning.

I felt so disrespected as a student. I don't know if I've ever been that frustrated by a teacher before. It was uncalled for. I know there are plenty of other things that teachers have said to others that were uncalled for...

"You obviously never learned to write." Well that's not exactly the fault of the student now is it? If the teachers can get through...what's that saying about the teacher? What does it mean about the student"

"What are you stupid? It's so simple." Well if it were that simple, we wouldn't asking questions now would we? You've said there are no such things as stupid questions...that was a stupid question. I've proved you wrong.


College applications are another aspect. Students are not paid to apply, we pay TO apply. We meet deadlines that are set by admission offices to make their lives easier. When a college says they'll have a decision for me by a date, I expect to have it by that date. How can I expect otherwise when I've abided by their deadlines. Unfortunately this is not the case, and it is thoroughly flustering. It makes me quite sad to find the work and effort I put into my life in the things I do can be overlooked so easily.

As I take the time to establish myself as something else, something other than what society wants to label me, I find it is extremely difficult to break out of the suffocating mold.

Welcome to the life behind Alyrissa Turin... heart