neutral Childhood and more neutral My life as a kid was horrible; i was overly obediant. My obediance in school and in my family angered me. Even if I felt angry I could never really do anything about it. In elementary I had at most two or three friends and I was frequently bullied, but like I said before I never did anything about it so the bullies thought I wouldn't defend myself and they thought right. At home I followed all of my parent's orders but I never felt right because of the extreme punishments they gave me for small mistakes. I always did great in school but sometime during elementary I saw school as idiotic and I rebelled at home and my grades plummeted in school. I actually defended myself in school and I started disregarding my parents orders even if it meant getting punished for it. A few years later in seventh grade I still defended myself but I could never have kept that up so I stopped my defensive act in school and I decided just to remain quiet to not draw attention towards myself. I had more friends but they were all idiots; they had no real sense of life but I was too scared to slip back into my old life so I kept up the charade. Meanwhile my life at home fell into chaos. The punishments got less severe but more frequent. The punishments also shifted from physical to mental. It undoubtably got worse but I kept up. My life had been slightly depressing until I met real friends in eighth grade and upon entering high school just last year. Things kind of stayed the same but I was happy to have real friends. At home I finally allowed my parents to have some control over me; that was a huge mistake. They just looked for any excuse to get me into trouble. If I would win an arguement with them it would be worse for me than a loss because they were the higher authority. While my life at home was getting worse, my social life was progressing. My friends showed me how to be more cheerful, happy, and outgoing. As of now my life continues the way I have just explained it and it's getting better.
heart Love Life heart
My love life has always been shaky. In fact I didn't have any friends that were girls until I entered high school. I've had a few girlfriends before high school but they were forced onto me by peer pressure. I didn't feel anything towards them. It has always been akward for me to talk to girls. When I was twelve I got a huge crush on a girl but I just couldn't express myself towards her. Right now I still have a small crush on her but we simply live too far away for there to be anything between us. I only see her every two years. I've seen her every two years since I was six and now I'm sixteen yet I have never told her I liked her. I think I didn't need to tell her though because it felt like she already knew but she was waiting for me to tell her; she didn't know I was still waiting for myself. We've had moments when I should've told her but I was too distracted by the moment and when I did try to tell her I was always interupted. Either way, what was will never be and I'll just have to live on. There really isn't a specific type of girl that I like. I just want a girl that is goodwilled and caring and that is all I will ever ask for.
I have not include everything but this should be a good thorough summary of myself.
inosent BystandR · Thu May 22, 2008 @ 11:50pm · 0 Comments |