Some of you already know that I am a member on Youtube. Well I was having som 'flashbacks' of when I used to stare at my profile on Youtube and wait for someone to talk to me. >.O And this is before I found Gaia! O.O
Well I miss being bored. Now I berly have free time anymore. Dx Im always busy at school, trying to pull my grades up to at least get on honor roll before I move. Moving makes me clean so that people can look at it and not trip over things. Just now I had to clean the WHOLE house in 10 minutes. Dx My life sucks! *Well not really*
Then there is my boyfriend. I wuvs him a lot and we spend a lot of time together. At school, movies and ect. But I think Im neglecting my friends! O.O So I am getting confused about a lot of things. To be with friends...Or boyfriend...Ugg... stressed
-Sighs- I'll figure out something soon...Hopefully... sweatdrop Well going on. My brother moved back in! o.o Well its just until tuesday...boy do I hate him. >.> He is going to rehab because he has a problem with drugs or something...Well not my problem. I just want him gone so I can FINALLY forget that I had a failur of a brother. >.> He is the one of 4 kids that failed life. Im the one who is passing! blaugh Im smart when it comes to peer pressure...Nothing can stop my mind from saying yes or no. I WONT do drugs or alchole.
Anywho. IM HAPPY! - The reason why I said that is because some of my best friends in the world have been trying to cheer me up from depression. Sad to say it but they failed but I give them credit for trying there best! ^-^
The reason why was one of my friends, Ayami Aras told me this:
Ayami_Aras
There is a thing called love and lust.
I was depressed because I lost someone who I thought I loved but I guess I really didnt. But then there was the lust. Lust made me go crazy. It started making me rot away inside. Making me loe death *In which I still do. heart * and see people dying in my mind when there still alive. *It was fun. xD* But it also made me scary and fear. I was close to getting lots of power of people. I scared them that they would be nice and gravel at my feet. xD
But still. Lust made me change into something that I really didnt want to be. I was actually turning into a Demon that I rp as in some threads. o.o How weird. >.O
But now that I have Cor Darkus. *I think thats spelled right...* he made me slowly turn back into my old self. He made me feel loved for real. He actually gave me something that I have wanted a long time. He held me in my arms and told me tha he loves me... EEE! I was so happy! heart heart heart
Also, I made a mistake about ONE of my friends. DarkAquaMoon. I hurt her feelings really bad by something that was false. I think I made her depressed and she is giving me and *according to her sister* everybody else the cold shoulder. I am trying my best to reach her but she ignores me in school, on Gaia and on both of our websites. Its sad. I made her a video to say im sorry...And even goodbye if she doesnt want to be my friend anymore...
Angel of Darkness. ~Neko Style~
I used everything that I had that she likes *I.E Song and anime* to make this. I really hope she watches it and comes up with an answer if she wants to be my friend or not. I would hate to lose her. ='(
Look at this cool Dream Avatar I did!
Like it? I sure do. This is my next avatar Im going to do after I complete the current one Im trying to get. *See profile*
Well thats a wrap up for this journal entry.
Tah tah for now! ^-^
heart `I L L heart
