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But why want I what I deserve to be?

Id say that Alternative Realities exist as I can see in myself where my Life could have changed and branched off into other jobs, relationships, careers, places I could have lived or moved too.

I could have been "My Father's Son" a liar, a user of people, a shitty low level con-artist. Probably in jail, or on the run from The Law/ Authorities.

I could have been "My Father's Son" but slightly lesser...what My Father became in in this world. A user & a liar but just smart an lucky enough to find a woman an have a child an know how to do basic maintenance an carpentry. A flirt who talks to every woman he see's like he knows everyone of them.

I could have been a thief an been in an out of jail my whole life...

I could have committed suicide 6 or 7 times already an be in whatever afterlife God gives me. Over the last 30 + years at different times since my teenage years.

My sister could have been born instead of me...she would have been 3 years older than me.

I could have become a school janitor for our local High School bu
t it didn't happen.

I could have been a comic/ cartoon artist....if I wasnt Such A Shitty Artist an my hands were better than they are. ( nerves in my hands shake a little.)

I could have went to college.... Why Bother? Im not smart enough an I dont have the guts to want to go fully on my own.

I could have been a mechanic to if I was anything to My Father an he had wanted to support me in anything I desired for the briefest moment in my life till I realized it never would be

I hate myself...There I Said It...