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Here I be, Gaia.
Hello, hello, Gaia. It's been a long-a** time, hasn't it?
Let's see... let's recap what's happened since the last time I've been here.
The year now? 2023
How old am I? 36....
Jumped into FFXIV and made some online friends. Some drama happened and we kinda-sorta fell apart, but the people who mattered either stayed or kind of linger and come back. The one thing that was the saddest to happen was that a good friend of ours just disappeared without a word. I'm deathly worried about her and hope she pokes her head in Discord just to even say that she's okay. The biggest thing that caused her to leave was that someone supposedly had her account stolen and announced that she committed suicide, but apparently, she just went away to take care of some family business. Since then, I've lost steam keeping up with the FFXIV updates and such, but I cherish the friends I've made through the game. Sad things haven't been the same after all that....
I am no longer in the military. But, my drive to continue in IT hasn't changed. At least... I think it hasn't. I feel like the more I'm in it studying, the drive starts to fizzle out. What do I do then?
I am still thankful for my time in the Navy, because there were things that I absolutely needed to figure out myself without people "influencing" me to do things despite they saying that they didn't do anything to sway my decisions.
The biggest change now is that... while I am home, I have not gotten in touch with old friends. I just... I don't know.... Ever since the pandemic, I haven't quite been the same. The things friends and family posted on Facebook was absolutely abhorrent and it didn't sit well with me, so I left that site. So, I have not touched it since... I dunno.. 2020? 2021? In some ways, it's been good for my mental health. But on the other hand... I'm alone.
Prior to me leaving the Navy, had a horrible time with some guy hell bent on making everything his problem and refuses to do anything about it, yet bring that attitude to the shop and making things awkward for everyone "working" with him. That is... if you could even get him to do anything. His favorite thing to do was kick his feet up, complain, and watch anime on his phone. Then, when ITCM and our big boss come in, he just pretends to work. It was overall a bad time.
I often said to people who ask me if I'm staying in that I felt like my luck was running out. I absolutely did have a good 7 years, and I'm not about to let some punks in the military ruin it for me, so it's about time I leave. I didn't feel comfortable staying in if people like Mr. Lazy-a** are allowed to stay in and rise up the ranks. That is not what this country needs right now. The irony of it all is that HE became the very thing he hated: poor leadership. E-5 and getting shown up by E-2s and E-3s, for crying out loud!
Oh! I also am a bit more active on Twitch nowadays. Well... not so much anymore because of school. But, I got myself somewhat of a VTuber model now (albeit one made from VRoid Studio, but a model nonetheless).
Also, after exploring this site a bit, it feels like I went back in time, because nothing feels like it's changed. These emotes are outdated, the forums look relatively unchanged, I'm currently staring at an old strange signature from past me about "Nyah gyah nyerp..." It's all too strange and feels like a relic in time. I'm curious about the overall vibe has changed. Are the forums just full of 30+ year olds talking about jobs, spouses, and children now?
Speaking of... I'll be single for the rest of my life. Long story short, things happened and now I'm afraid of commitment or getting into a relationship. The betrayal is unbearable.
But anyway, I'm home now, but am now currently stalling writing this final paper for my Interpersonal Communications class. Some things never change. xd
Until the next vent,
JEP out!
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