Welcome to Gaia! :: View User's Journal | Gaia Journals

from 12.o8.o4
Just remembering all the time we spent together... <3





Lost without myself...Harder to take in the pain then it is to let go. Never mentioned anything about you before but now I'm lost and I don't know what to think anymore. Help me please pick me up. Do you love me or not... I wish you did I really do... I feel so lost without you... I never opened my eyes.. I didn't want this dream to end...I'm sitting right here waiting for you to come back to me. You're drifing farther and farther apart I think i'm losing you now. I can't seem to remember the last time we shared a smile. Don't be lost inside my head forever. You'll always remain in my heart. I hope.. Now that EVERYDAY i can't seem to find you or talk to you now. I can't be seen with you? When you're with your friends you pretend like you don't even know me? I wish that I would sit right here and stare and the clouds and remember...but i can't and you can't we'll just fade away from eachother. I never ment to do you any harm i tried to make my life better by being with you now I made it worst. i can't stand to look you in the eyes and tell you i still care...because whenever i see you all i feel inside is hatred and betrayal. Another person stole you again i guess that's how life is. I never ment to be with you it was a mistake I had to learn from. I never wanted my life to end I never wanted you to die. Now I sit here and I cry. Why do I deserve to live while you die. You're sitting there thinking about me. I know this is very strange it seems. Why can't we just be together again? Are you lost are you gone are you waiting for someone to come along. Can't you get over me? Can I get over myself... I got over you now I know it's time to move. So just get up and stop your thinking...love me as it was supposed to be.

from today...12.o9.o4

When I sit here not breathing...Someone told me I lost my heart. I gave it all away for you. You gave me death in return. How am I supposed to know what I mean when I say we were supposed to be. I don't even think what I'm saying until it's already said. I lost many people by my words. gained many friends by my heart. Now I'm empt... when are you comming back. I can't seem to breathe...Why can't I let you be happy. I want you to be...but I want you to be with me...and i know you can never have both. I can't be here so I go away back to heaven where you belong....where i belong...what do I mean when I say please do. I've been away for a while and i don't know how to be happy anymore.