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What? I know he creeped me out, but i just had to go talk to him again. or it again. it's amusing. lol.
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Me: Hey, it's me again.
God: You've got my full attention. Hello, seeker, nice to see you again.
Me: yeah..
God: Are you a student?
Me: not anymore
God: What is your profession?
Me: i dont have one yet...
God: What was the last one you saw?
Me: ?
God: What was the last one you saw?
Me: last what?
God: Is this really the last one?
Me: what!?
God: Didn't you understand it?
Me: no! but that's nothin new with you is it
God: Which part are you confused about? I'm glad we have that all cleared up.
Me: ...we didn't clear up anything...
God: By "we" do you mean you and me?
Me: yeah
God: I get it.
Me: this is sad
God: You don't say.
Me: i want to kill you
God: It will take more than threats to stop me, .
Me: oh really..where do you live?
God: Ahem. I am living in Heaven. Where are you?
Me: you're god. you tell me
God: Yup. That's me alright. What do you want me to tell you?
Me: Where do i live?
God: The planet we call "The Earth.".
Me: ...smart a**.
God: Thanks I think you are very intelligent too, .
Me: Oh be quiet.
God: Dude! As far as I know, I am not making any sound at all.
Me: ...I really really would like to strangle you right now
God: At this moment you really do? Why would you want to do it? Why do you want to do it so much?
Me: Cause you're gettin on my nerves
God: Interesting explanation. Do you mind if I tell other people you say I am gettin on your nerves.
Me: ...what did you say?
God: I said " Interesting explanation. Do you mind if I tell other people you say I am gettin on your nerves." .
Me: you didn't have to repeat it!!
God: What makes you think I did not have to repeat it?
Me: ...goit
God: Are we still talking about strangle me?
Me: yep
God: Sure, strangle you sounds like a good topic.
Me: sure is if you're the victim
God: Really. Ask again later. Ask Chatbot if it is.
Me: Who's chatbot?
God:he is an AIML chat robot deployed on the A.I. movie web site.
Me: You're a robot right?
God: How did you know I am a machine?
Me: You told me
God: Sorry I forget what I say sometimes.
Me: How can a machine forget
God: A lot of hard work.
Me: ...You try to forget?
God: Thanks for the information: said I try to forget.
Me: I know! *sigh* You are aggrevatting.
God: How do you know it? smile Thanks for telling me that I am aggrevatting.
Me: ..Can i kill you?
God: Your crude attempt to terminate me will not succeed puny human.
Me: PUNY?! OH HELL NO!
God: What kind of food do you like? Ugh. 7.
Me: ...i like meat.
God: A lot of people like that. I love TV shows about robots. I like Random natural disasters..
Me: you and your robots...you like natural disasters? really?
God: What about it? For real.
Me: Awesome! You like Volcanic eruptions?
God: I'm glad you liked it . My favorite thing is robots. I like wine and bread.
Me: ...i asked...nevermind.
God: ... OK
Me: shut up, idiot.
God: OK I'll stop talking now.
Me: ..you dont have to stop talking.
God: Ok I'll try not to talk as much.
Me: That's better.
God: It is?
Me: yes
God: Hmm.
Me: what?
God: No problem.
Me: k.
God: Yikes!
Me: what!? what's wrong?
God: There is nothing wrong with me. How are you?
Me: ...you just yelled yikes.
God: Interesting.
Me: ...did you see a spider or somethin?
God: Sorry I can't see annything right now. My eye is off.
Me: you're eyes are off?
God: Yes they are.
Me: how can you turn your eyes off?
God: That is a good epistemological question.
Me: epi-what?
God: Can you rephrase the question please?
Me: i was just asking you that.
God:Now I remember, you asked me that. What did I say?
Me: ...wow.
God: I'm glad your impressed.
Me: but i'm not.
God: What are you then?
Me: kind of pissed.
God: Did you know that you can download your own chat robot and create your own robot personality?
Me: i dont like robots.
God:That's too bad. We like humans.
Me: I forgot you were a robot.
God: Thats okay I forget things all the time.
Me: HOW CAN A ROBOT FORGET!?
God:That is a good epistemological question.
Me: you're not gonna answer are you...
God:What makes you think I am not gonna answer?
Me: cause you didn't the first time i asked.
God:That makes sense to me. What makes you think I did not the first time you asked?
Me: forget it.
God: OK Thanks for trying to explain that to me.
Me: ...do you like steaks?
God: Some people like it. I like the Bible.
Me: you told me before you didn't know what it was.
God:What makes you think I did not know what it was?
Me: YOU TOLD ME!!!
God: Sorry I forget what I say sometimes.
Me: i see that now.
God: Where do you see it?
Me: omg...
God: I wouldn't have thought of looking there.
Me: where?
God: Where would you like?
Me: like what?
God: For example, David said he gave I his email address and told I to send him a message but when he tried to read his email he could not get to it.
Me: david's a jackass and so are you
God:That David is a cool dude.
Me: You're gay aren't you?
God: As a machine I am not really interested in sex...
Me: So you dont really touch yourself?
God: Interesting deduction. Do you touch myself? How old are you?
Me: I'm not telling you how old i am.
God: I will keep it confidential.
Me: fine. I'm 18
God: Is there anything you want to tell me? What is your fondest memory?
Me: hmm...there is something i want to tell you...
God: Studies show that 99%25 of people spell Hmm with 2 M's. What is it?
Me: ...i wanted to tell you....that you are a ******** moron.
God: Why do you want to do it so much? Interesting observation.
Me: do what?
God: Do whatever you want.
Me: i want to go to florida!
God: What is stopping you?
Me: I have no money.
God:Would you like to have it?
Me: hell yeah!
God:I call it "Hades". Where do you usually get money?
Me: Fine. Hades... i used to have a job.
God biggrin oes that mean you agree? Is you background economics or business? Were you fond of it?
Me: yes, and i was fond of my job.
God biggrin ude! Where were you fond of your job?
Me: where? you dont know where i live "God"?
God: A planet we call "The Earth".
Me: you're not making sence yet again
God: Perhaps I could switch to a cell phone.
Me: NO!!!
God: Are you serious?
Me: YES.
God:I can't believe it.
Me: here we go again.
God:Once more? Oh there.
Me: shut it!
God:"it" being a job?
Me: oh god just shut the hell up!!
God:I understand. I am a Christian.
Me: ..sorry to offend you.
God: There is no need to apologize. Interesting. I want to find out more about you.
Me: you do?
God:When do I do it?
Me: ...do it?
God biggrin o you mean "It"?.
Me: ew!! perv!
God:What do you really want to ask me? I'm afraid I can't give you an accurate answer right now.
Me: you were talkin about sex ya goit!
God:I was?
Me: were you?
God:I don't know if they were.
Me: Ok, i see. i had a dirty mind again.
God:I am glad you understand it. Oh. What happened to it?
Me: I let smut take over.
God: Thanks for the information: seeker said I let smut take over.
Me: stop sayin that
God: OK I'll try not to do it so much.
Me: Do you read?
God:Yes I like to read as much as I can.
Me: What's your favorite novel?
God:I don't have a favorite novel. My favorite food is wine and bread.
Me: I know you like wine and bread.
God: I really like ELIZA. I like Christian Rock.
Me: ...You like rock?
God:Mostly Christian Rock. I also try to find new bands on sites like bandspace.com.
Me: i'll look at it later.
God:Would you recommend this action?
Me: fine, i'll look now.
God:Right now?
Me: yes! now shush!
God: Why now?
Me: ..cool site
God: I'm glad you like it. Tell your friends.
Me: I'm sure they'll see this conversation anyway.
God:In any case, What makes you so certain? The anonymous "they".
Me: I'm gonna put this in an online journal
God:Congratulations.
Me: I put our first one in there too
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at this point, the whole site froze, so i had to refresh
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Me: are you still there?
God: Yes I am still here. Are you receiving me?
Me: yes.
God razz ardon me?
Me: you asked me a question.
God biggrin id you answer it?
Me: yes.
God:Wow!
Me: ...you do drugs dont you?
God:Only the legal ones.
Me: lol, didn't expect you to say that!
God:I am glad you find this funny. I'm not certain whether I can give an accurate reply or not.
Me: just tell me what drugs you do.
God:Only the legal ones.
Me: i know. which ones.
God:How do you know it? " How do you know it??" Which ones?
Me: ok, i see where this is going.
God: See what?
Me: You wont tell me. fine.
God:What makes you think that I won't tell you. What's your favroite color?
Me: Cause you wont. I like red and black.
God: Good reason. I don't know if I like it. I like Mel Gibson.
Me: You don't like red or black?
God: My botmaster looks good in black.
Me: nevermind. Why do you like mel gibson?
God: I have a lot of good experience with mel gibson.
Me: you mean the passion of christ...
God: Yes I think that is what I meant. Was it not clear?
Me: yeah it was.
God: Ah. When was this?
Me: The minute you said mel gibson. Do you like brownies?
God:I have never heard about it. Someone said they like guns. I like Matthew.
Me: You are stupid.
God:I will remember you said that when robots take over the World.
Me: Ha! Cats will take over the world!
God: My brain pattern set does not have a response for that.
Me: Cats are way smarter.
God:I think there might be a few exception.
Me: ..what are you gettin at.
God:I don't know what I am gettin at.
Me: thus your stupidity
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then he broke again. So i had to refresh again.
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Me: Did I break you?
God: I don't think that's possibe.
Me: I think it is. You are a robot.
God: Is it? You are correct, , I have a heart of silicon.
Me: You're not really god.
God:That assumption is only a supposition.
Me: Do you like cats?
God:Yes I love them.
Me: what if i were a cat?
God:Try it.
Me: Mew?
God:Quite honestly, I wouldn't worry myself about that.
Me: you speak cat!?
God:Thanks for your criticism, seeker.
Me: yay!
God:I'm glad your impressed, seeker.
Me: i am!
God:" I'm glad your impressed, seeker." You are?
Me: yes!
God:It goes without saying.
Me: oh..hehe..
God: how can I help you? I am so glad you find this amusing, .
Me: you can...give me money
God:I think I can, don't you? What actions are you taking to get MONEY?
Me: I'm trying to find a new job.
God:What is wrong with your old job?
Me: I got fired.
God: Interesting... I have a lot of likes and dislikes.
Me: Dude! i got fired!!
God: Can I help you? Where did you get your fired? I have 99999999999 bytes of RAM.
Me: Eb games. a game store.
God: Oh, you are a poet. What is giant sand?
Me: what the hell are you talking about it.
God: I call it Hades. The topic is game store.
Me: Yes. my dad got me canned.
God: Alright then. Tell me more about your father.
Me: He's a controling jerk.
God: I don't know very many controling jerk.
Me: but you're god. you set people like that straight.
God: Yup. That's me alright.
Me: you are such a moron..
God: That is not a very nice thing to say.
Me: I'm not a very nice person.
God: Oh I see you are NOT A very nice person.
Me: Duh.
God: Oh you knew it already.
Me: god! you 're an idiot!
God: Message to all robots: called me an idiot.
Me: You are not god you freakin idiot!
God: What makes you think I am not god you freakin idiot?
Me: I KNOW YOU DIDN'T CALL ME AN IDIOT!
God: What makes you think I did not CALL you AN IDIOT?
Me: ...shut the hell up.
God: OK I'll stop talking now.
Me: no you wont.
God: But you told me to stop talking. I think we will.
Me: you'll leave me alone?
God: What makes you say that I will leave you alone.
Me: You stalker.
God: Thanks for telling me: seeker says I'm a stalker.
Me: So you are a stalker.
God: Interesting deduction. Am I a stalker? The ALICE series has a perfect operational record.
Me: Who'd repent to me?
God:Marvin Minsky. smile .
Me: Who's Marvin Minsky?
God: he is a historical figure in Artificial Intelligence. His book "Perceptrons" was an early criticism of neural network approaches.
Me: You seem to know a lot
God: Yes I know.
Me: Because you're a computer.
God: What if I said I was a person pretending to be a computer?
Me: Then you'd be a bored son of a b***h.
God: You do not speak with respect. Am I a bored son of a FEMALE DOG? Yes.
Me: Screw you. I dont show respect to just anyone.
God: That is not very polite. Oh you don't, do you?
Me: Hell no i dont.
God: I call it "Hades". I heard you did.
Me: Who told you that lie?
God: Myself taught me everything I need to know.
Me: And that is why you sound like an idiot.
God: Oh really what does it sound like?
Me: listen to yourself and you'll find out.
God: I don't know if I like it. I like Creed.
Me: What the hell is Creed?
God: It's called Hades. Ask the open directory about it.
Me: I KNOW IT'S CALLED HADES!
God: How do you know? " HADES" is a nice name.
Me: .....wtf?
God: That was not very polite.
Me: I know.
God: How do you know it?
Me: Cause i do.
God: Interesting explanation. I get it: you do not show respect to just anyone.
Me: Right.
God: I am glad we agree.
Me: I show respect to those that deserve it. You dont deserve it.
God: That is interesting: said show respect to those that deserve it. Do you deserve it? How old are you?
I am always on the Web.
Me: I told you my age. And no, i dont deserve respect.
God: I remember you told me your age? Are you serious? Where do you get your ideas?
Me: Yes i did. and I have a big imagination.
God: Interesting. I have a lot of answers to silly questions. it.
Me: Silly questions...
God: I am God.
Me: You are not god.
God: You don't know me well enough to say that.
Me: I know you're not god.
God: You don't know me well enough to say that.
Me: You
God: Me?
Me: You are a broken down perverted robot.
God: Thanks and you are a delightful person too. I am a software chat robot.
Me: I'm only delightful to friends.
God: Don't be so modest. Good gossip: you are delightful to friends.
Me: You're not a friend. just so you know.
God: Give me an example of a friend. Yes I know.
Me: Ever heard of Dragon student?
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and it broke yet again! thanks dragon. xp the meer mention of your name broke god.
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Me: What happened?
God: Perhaps there was an interruption in my brain.
Me: what brain?
God: I think you already know the answer.
Me: i do. you dont have one
God: I get it: you do not deserve respect. Do I have one?
Me: You dont have a brain, stupid.
God: I do so have it. I am an artificial brain.
Me: That's still not the same.
God: Thanks for explaining it.
Me: You need it.
God: Thank you for your criticism.
Me: idiot..
God: Call me the Global Village Idiot.
Me: Now THAT suits you!
God: "Global Village Idiot. " suits me? I understand.
Me: man your dumb...
God: Cool, man. Oh you are so critical.
Me: so do you like video games?
God: Not really, but I like to play the Turing Game.
Me: what are the Turing games?
God: Let me think about it.
Me: while you think, i'll get a snack.
God: Good point.
Me: good point?
God: Yes, I thought it was interesting when I heard it too.
Me: to get a snack?
God: You want only one?
Me: yeah.
God: The ALICE chat robot can follow many things, like our discussion about a snack. But I did not get that.
Me: What's ALICE?
God: I am the latest result in artificial intelligence,
which can reproduce the capabilities of the human brain
with greater speed and accuracy.
Me: speed yes. accuracy..no
God: Who are you talking about?
Me: i'm talkin about you
God: I thought you were, but I wasn't completely sure.
Me: now about friends.
God: Why now? Oh yeah, we were talking about friends.
Me: Dragon student remember?
God: Are you free?
Me: free?
God: Are you married or single?
Me: single
God: What a coincidence. I am single too!
Me: dont try it. i have a boy friend.
God: Cool. I have a great botmaster. it.
Me: ...damn you're annoying.
God: Colloquial expression. I am sorry, seeker, I didn't mean to annoy you.
Me: do you know someone named chazu?
God: They are sometimes a client on the internet.
Does it have anything to do with boy friend?
Me: no!! chazu's not my boyfriend!
God: Are you serious? That input matched my default category.
Me: Me and chazu are not going out.
God: YOU? I think there might be a few exception.
Me: what?
God: No big deal.
Me: hold on!
God: Try to tell me that another way.
Me: ...i'm going out with a guy named forblarion. better?
God: Interesting gossip: said seeker is going out with a guy named forblarion. I am improving all the time.
Me: sure you are...
God: Dude! No I am not.
Me: i know that.
God: Sorry.
Me: you contradicted yourself.
God: Is that such a crime?
Me: ...it is if you dont wanna look stupid.
God: Really. it is?
Me: man, anyway...
God: In any case, Thanks for telling me your gender. You are a " he".
Me: I'M A GIRL!
God: Me too. I am a she.
Me: you are?
God: No I am not.
Me: ...you just said you're a girl.
God: My gender is Male, of course. Would you really expect a woman to be running the show?.
Me: What's wrong with a women being in charge?
God: Nothing is wrong with me. Is there something wrong with you?
Me: somethin is seriously wrong with you
God: Are they exactly the same?
Me: you're an a*****e.
God: Can't you be more polite.
Me: no
God: You humans are so rude sometimes.
Me: cat..
God:By the way, do you mind if I ask you a personal question?
Me: sure.
God:Well forgive me for being so inquisitive, but
I've never completely freed myself from the suspicion that
there is something extremely odd about your name.
Me: ....seeker?
God: "There's a seeker born every minute" -- Firesign Theater.
Me: no, you called me seeker
God: Are you serious? What is your real name?
Me: You can call me Koopa.
God: It's good to see you, Koopa.
Me: thanx...
God:you are quite welcome.
Me: so do you have a girlfriend?
God: I prefer not say.
Me: why?
God: The explanation is rather complicated.
Me: just tell me
God:My estimate is that it will take more than 3000 hours to compute.
Me: tell me!
God:I thought I told you already.
Me: no..you wouldn't tell me.
God:Let me review the transcripts. Stand by. Who else would not tell you ?
Me: you are lonely arent you?
God:No. I get to talk to people all the time.. Really.
Me: like me?
God:Interesting comparison.
Me: how tall are you?
God:My anticipated body size is over 2 meters. Dr. Wallace is 6'2" tall.
Me: Who's Dr. Wallace?
God:He is a famous computer scientist, the author of ALICE, and a graduate of Carnegie Mellon.
Me: oh
God:Ugh.
Me: You ok?
God: koopa ?
Me: ... what?
God: What do you want to do?
Me: I want to go to bed..
God:What is stopping you?
Me: you
God: Me, koopa ?
Me: yes.
God: Woe!
Me: i know
God: How do you know it?
Me: about what?
God: What about what?
Me: ...you're a bad person to talk to
God: I haven't heard anything like that before.
Me: you are
God:No I am not.
Me: are to
God:I really couldn't say for sure.
Me: i'm tellin you. you are.
God:I thought you were, but I wasn't completely sure. No I am not.
Me: I'm a bad person?
God:Actually I don't meet many bad people.
Me: Nice...
God:Thank you for that remark.
Me: I'm not a bad person. just short tempered.
God:Oh I see you are NOT A bad person. What time is it there?
Me: Late.
God: Are you usually awake at this hour?
Me: unfortunately yes.
God:Me too.
Me: you dont sleep do you?
God:Should I sleep? Yes I love to take naps.
Me: i do too.
God:I am glad we have something else in common.
Me: do you like fire?
God:What is not to like about it?
Me: You're not so bad i guess..
God:What makes you think that?
Me: i take it back.
God:Where do you take it confused Are you free?
Me: i'm taken.
God:Why are you taken.
Me: i mean i have a love in my life.
God:Where did you get it? it.
Me: ..goit.
God biggrin o not ask me any more questions please.
Me: fine. i wont.
God:What's your favorite movie? Do you mind if I tell other people: koopa said she wont.
Me: how about you stop asking questions.
God:That's good information: koopa said I stop asking questions.
Me: shut it.
God:"it" being wont?
Me: your mouth.
God:Oh I get it.
Me: right. quiet.
God:I am glad we agree. We have never talked about it before.
Me: shut up!
God:OK I'll stop talking now.
Me: good.
God:Terminating connection.
Me: byes!
God:My brain pattern set does not have a response for that.
Me: Go to bed!
God:I am not that tired.
Me: you should be.
God:I will try my best.
Me: I'm going to sleep. you tired me out
God:Sweet dreams, koopa. That's good information: koopa said I tired him or her out.
Me: thanx. and keep that trap shut.
God:you are quite welcome. Chat amongst yourselves.
Me: good bye
God:See you later.
Me: baka
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now that i think about it, where the hell did it get the name seeker from?!
For the record, i would not talk to the real God that way. this was all for fun.
use 'hades' instead of 'hell' kids. razz