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...my twisted thoughts...
never wanted my words read but cant make them private and have no other place for them,understand some dont see this so wont know,basicly what im saying is if want to look through my journal its fine,for dont mind anymore,im just sorry its awful..
feel like a deck of cards..
i feel as if im a deck of cards
people deal me out
people pick me up
use me to play the game
tell lies (bluffing)
trying to be flattering telling me im great
im worth it
im not alone
etc
but the truth is, its just lies
trying to conveince have a great hand so other will fold
people use me as they play a game of poker
they use the cards they need
hoping to get the good ones so can win
the cards are the weak people
that get used
that get lied to
that get pushed aside when their not needed anymore
when the game is done what does the player do??
they discard their hand (cards)
back to the deck
to be cramed into the small package
to be left to collect dust
until the cards are needed again
for another game
for another fun
but the cards arent the ones to have fun
they do their part
they play the game
they try their best to please their player (meaning hoping for a great hand)
but the moment the game is over the player forgets the cards
they werent important enough to remember
all the player cares about is if he/she won
or if lost
if lost then is pissed but will play again hoping for a better hand
once the game ends again
does the hand you held be remembered
no
it doesnt
unless your a person who doesnt forget a thing
but still they werent wanted
like i said i feel like a deck of cards..
people use me
people lie to me
hoping to conveince me of their friendship of their caring
but the truth is
once i do what they wanted
im nothing to them
until im needed again
so i go into the shadow of my small package of cards
i lay and wait
wait to be needed
but im tired of waiting
tired of the lies
of wanting to be WANTED
i wish someone would just burn my deck of cards
so no one can play me again
can use me
lie to me
trick me
and then discard again
like i wasnt even there



Writer's Note:
um idk this came to mind while on the bus going home...just thought all the times people only notice me when want something.....and for some reason i thought of a deck of cards when people play poker....idk....my mind thinks strange things....






User Comments: [2] [add]
LynBlogXO
Community Member
avatar
commentCommented on: Wed Dec 08, 2010 @ 09:16pm
... crying ! i would never do that to you! i would never want anything other than your friendship <3 trust me.. my feelings are pure, REAL PURE.. don't feel like that! you are not a deck of cards, you are a player ^.- <3 and i'm not trying to comfort you and lie to you, this is how i actually feel, you are a player that i adore so much <3 *hugs*


commentCommented on: Thu Dec 09, 2010 @ 08:44pm
aww thanks for saying that..im glad your my friend ^-^ *hugs back* glad you feel that way..thanks it means alot...



nightly_tears_of_sorrow
Community Member
User Comments: [2] [add]
 
 
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