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Fragmented Self who wanders through life like a dreamer and wades through the river of dreams as though it were the only truth left in this world
Dear Self
I'm glad I'm not the only one
It's strange to say I'm grateful. Grateful that my brother feels the same as I about our cousins and remembers all of the hateful actions they have committed over the years.
Grateful as I am, I am also fearful.
With the shared knowledge, I also wonder if we share the same prison. After all, we shared the same parents and our childhoods are very close to one another. Though we've been opposites in academia, our social lives are closely linked.
God I hope I'm wrong.
But in the faith of that which is November, I trust the worst. I cannot think of any other viewpoint other than that which dooms us both. If I were to correct my behavior maybe he can be spared. I can see he could get away but as long as our fates are closely linked, I cannot trust November with his future. I cannot trust anyone with his future but the two of us.
November is the death of us all.



And so it goes and goes around and round
It's November once again
but
this time
I was left alone in the cold,
without a fire,
without someone to hold my hand.
I was forgotten
like him
like my love
like our needs
like time
and the basic human need to mourn
GOD
I fawking hate the way you say
over and over, every ******** year
"celebrate him in a good way"
but I
I
need to mourn
I
I need this
I can't
I can't move on
NOT THIS TIME
I've already done this once
YOU may not know
BUT I HAVE
HE DIED TOO!
and I feel the loss everyday...
love
what is love
love is pain
love is the daily reminder
love is worth everything





 
 
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