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Dear John,
rofl Today is my last day at home! Well... for two weeks... Im leaving the states! Im going to the Mediterranean! Im going to be gone for 12 days! Im visiting Italy, the Balkans, Israel, Egypt, and Greece! Im super excited! We are going to do all of this super cool stuff! Im going to miss a lot of my friends though... Especially my ex-boyfriend :/ I know I shouldnt miss him! I shouldnt care about him at all! But I do... so so much... For privacy sake we can just call him Xx.
Even if you dont want to hear the story of Xx, I am going to tell anyway, cause thats the point of a journal, right? So me and Xx started dating in November.. November 11th to be exact. Its sad that I still remember that. We had a great time together and liked each other a lot, you know the feeling, yeah? Well on May 12, Xx tells me that he doesnt want a girlfriend. That I will be in Europe for 2 weeks and Im going to Williamsburg later, and he will be doing a lot of football camps, and applying to colleges, the whole sha-bang, so he just didnt see how it made sense that we stayed together. I understand that and all, but come on, we dated for 7 months, and he is just coming out of the blue with this. He continues on for two and a half more hours about how I am such a special girl and a great girl friend, and how he likes me " a lot a lot." What is a girl supposed to do with that? Anyway, so we still talk every once and a while, and it isnt often, but still! And he regularly hints at his feelings for me. What I dont get is why he broke up with me! I mean I understand the whole time theory and girlfriend thing. But he insists on still liking me, and letting me know! Its like taking a knife and shoving it in my chest repeatedly. crying WTFF anyway, so that is the story of me and Xx. Jerkk off. I guess I just dont mean enough to him for him to want to put in effort. Although he did say it would be nice to see me again the other day. Just a stupid thought in my head but: What if he sees he made a mistake and doesnt know how to admit it?