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I need to see Mark. And very soon. I want to go to the park. I glare at the pile of black and red. There’s no way I’m passing that. I turn to face the window again. The breeze blows hair from my face. It dries the tears on my face. It whispers encouragement through the bush below my window. I decide in that moment. I find a pen and paper and scrawl a messy note. I lay it on my bed and set to work ruining my window. I push at the flyscreen and it slips a little. I work it out and it lands noisily on the ground. I hold my breath, waiting for a noise to tell me that Mum heard. There’s nothing out of the ordinary. I give me three word note a glance before climbing through the clear window frame. I rest the flyscreen on my window sill so it sort of looks like it’s still in place. The breeze picks up to a wind.
I quickly make my way to the front lawn and when I couldn’t see a silhouette in the lounge room window I run. I slow to a quick walk and take my phone out of my pocket. I find Mark’s number, thankful that I hadn’t got around to deleting it. The three words I had written float around in my head. I press call. Be back soon. Ring. Be back soon. Ring. Be back soon. Ri-
“Hayley? What’s wrong?”
I was half hoping he wouldn’t pick up. I take a deep breath and hold it, unable to form words to tell him.
“Hayley?!” His voice is high with worry and fear of the unknown.
“I need to see you.” It comes out in a rush. Silence comes down the line. I stop on the corner of my block. Cars and trucks rumble by. I spot a bus and turn my back to it. “Please?”
I hear a deep breath being taken. “Alright.”
I sigh in relief. “At the park.”
“I have a better idea – are you sure you’re okay?”
I run a hand through my hair. “I’ve been better.” I hope my stress can’t be heard in my voice.
“Have you...” He trails off into heavy silence.
Somebody walks past me in a hurry. “Have I what?”
“Never mind.”
“Mark, tell me.”
“Where are you?” There’s a hint of worry in his voice.
“East end of my street, why?”
“Head south.”
I turn to face that direction but don’t walk. “Why?”
“Just do it.”
“Tell me why or I’ll see you at the park.”
“Don’t go there!” Panic.
“Why?” I move to the fence next to me so I’m not near anyone.
“Just trust me.”
“I can’t.”
“Please?”
“I’m going to the park.” I cross the road quickly and continue heading east.
“Don’t!”
I wince as it nearly bursts my eardrums. “Tell me why!”
There’s no reply. I could faintly hear footsteps through the phone. It sounds like he’s running. I hang up. I feel sort of flattered that he’s running to meet me and more than a little confused. I look around. There’s more cars. Knock off time, I guess. The park slowly creeps into my view until I’m on the road it’s on. I could already feel the soothing effect of the smell. I cross the road. There’s a rhythmic pounding of feet to my right and I dismiss it as a jogger. The grass crunches under my feet and I take a deep breath of the earthy scent. The smell of the city is sometimes unbearable.
“Hayley!”
I turn quickly to the familiar voice. Mark approaches me, his face red and breathing hard. He stops just in front of me and bends over, hands on his knees. His back rises and falls in time with the breaths. He raises his slightly less red face.
“Jesus... Christ, Hayley.” He says it between breaths. “Are you... mental?”
“What? Why?”
Anger passes over his face like a mask. “Think! You must be stupid... to not have realised... why.”
I’m ready to slap him and before I knew it I had raised a hand and taken a step forward. He leaps back and it brings me to my sense. I take a deep breath and lower my arm. “Oh, Mark, I’m sorry.”
He looks at me with wary eyes. “It’s alright.”
“Why didn’t you want me here?”
“The people.”
“Oh.”
“Yeah, ‘oh’.” He closes the gap between us and takes a slow breath. “So you’ve finally figured it out?”
“Yes, but why? Why do I suddenly have this... this... curse?” I want to grab his shoulders and shake the answer out of him. I don’t though, I’m too scared.
“I’ve told you already. I’m sorry. I’m so, so sorry.”
“You’re sorry? You didn’t...” I trail off and narrow my eyes at him. “You gave it to me?”
“I’m sorry! I just couldn’t stand any more. I can’t keep my emotions in track anymore.”
“So you palm it off onto me.” I cross my arms.
He’s quiet for a moment. “Come, let’s get out of here.” He starts to walk.
After a moment to gather my scattered thoughts I follow him. Rage simmers just below the surface.