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"Hey, Nana
Facing our mistakes and the wounds they leave...
Even if we accept them they won't disappear.
I'm still calling your name, Nana.
No matter how much it hurts...
I won't stop until you answer me."

I found our locket today. I had hidden it from myself. Two days ago I found my key again. Isn't it funny how I always lose what is important to me?

I... wonder how many more people I will lose. I, don't think it will ever end.

People tell me that high school is where you change the most but... I think they're wrong. In college you change even more. You learn who you want to be for life, not just a few years. Perhaps, that is where I keep ******** up.

Sometimes, I indulge myself in the fantasy that, I am too advanced. That, I try to give too much to people who don't know what they want or that they don't see what it is until it's gone. Would it be the other way around, since I keep losing?

Other times I wish I was from the future. Then I... would have an excuse.... for never fitting in and... always waiting for others to catch up.

Maybe....
Ha.
....
Mayb...
Get ahold of yourself...
Maybe my life is in reverse. Maybe I get the best parts earlier and the worst as life goes on? No, there is more good in store for me. Better things. I ... have to believe. There is no strawberry glass. I...broke it myself. I will take the cuts into myself only, I won't let you take this into you. This will be mine. This bittersweet dream that etches and stretches. Hmm, reverse indeed. First you take then you give. First I give then I take. First you give then you take. First I take then I give.

Reverse my smile, there is no truth in it. I want to burn in ice.