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Prologue of the other book I'm writing! Tell me what you think!

I woke up when I heard a loud bang, then I heard someone talking, and then my father spoke.
I slowly got up, careful to go around the one squeaky floorboard in my room. My door was cracked, and I could see a tall figure, he was standing by our front door, it had been kicked in. I tuned into the conversation, not even risking a breath.
“Please, I am asking you nicely.” Said the figure, his voice was eerily compelling.
“No, you can’t have her.” Answered my father. My mother was clinging to him, and crying silently.
“But I’ve been watching her for almost a year, and she is perfect. I must have her as my bride.” The figure sounded slightly irritated.
“And I am telling you no!” My father exclaimed.
“What’s going on?” I heard myself ask. It was just then that I realized I’d opened my door and walked toward the living room.
All eyes turned to me; my mother’s solemn, tear filled green eyes, and my father’s dark brown ones, and the dark figure’s too. His eyes were very peculiar, icy blue on the edges, with a tinge of red around the pupil. It made his eyes look a dark purple.
I was staring into those eyes, deeply into them. Then, my mother ran over and hugged me, almost sobbing. I put my arms around her, startled out of my mesmerization.
“What’s wrong? Who is he?” I asked, rage building inside me. Who was this man? Why and how did he make my mother cry?
And why was he staring at me like I was the most beautiful and wonderful thing in the universe?
“Kara… such a beautifully fitting name for such a beautiful woman…” The stranger murmured, awe struck.
“W-what?” I stuttered, “How do you know my name? Who are you?”
“Oh forgive me—“
“His name is ‘Lord Dimitri’” My father interrupted snidely, “And I am calling the cops on him. For stalking, breaking & entering, and harassment.”
“Not a good idea.” Dimitri said, suddenly behind my father. He picked him up by his head, and gave a hard jerk. I heard the most sickening crack of my life, and watched as my father’s eyes went blank.
“Daddy!” I cried.
My mother stared in horrified shock.
Dimitri dropped my father and headed for my mother. I stepped in front of her, wrapping my arms around her.
“No,” I said simply, knowing that he would stop.
Just as I’d suspected, he stopped dead in his tracks.
My eyes were blurring with tears, but I could still see his expression. He was smiling at me, not maliciously, but sincerely.
“You’ll see that all of this is for a reason my dear. Please don’t fight me.” He said, just as compelling as ever.
“No,” I said, my sadness seeping from my voice.
He took a step closer.
“No!” I shrieked, throwing myself at him. He carefully caught me, and hugged me tightly for a second. No matter how I struggled I couldn’t get him to let go. He laid me down on the couch, and by the time I’d gotten up and jumped on him, getting him in a chokehold, my mother was already dead.
“Mommy!” My grip on his neck loosened, and I slid off of his back, landing in a pathetic, crumpled pile on the living room floor.
I could feel him gently pick me up, cradling me in his arms.
“Why me?” I asked, mostly to myself. I sounded broken, like I wouldn’t mind dying.
Dimitri just smiled, and put his lips to my neck, he kissed it lightly, and then I felt a sting, a sting like no other. I screamed, but my scream faded to a moan as the pain became a numb sensation. It was almost pleasurable.
The last thing I remember, he was sitting me down on a couch, and my body ached uncontrollably.
And then… I woke up.
It was amazing, it was dark, but I could see as if it was day. And I could smell blood, and that’s when I remembered.
I sat up so quickly that I should have been disoriented by it, but I wasn’t.
I saw him. Lord Dimitri. I didn’t really understand what was so special about him. He’s tall and handsome and all that, but he was cruel; and right now, he was smiling at me, and I’d never seen a more sickening smile, not even in my nightmares.
I launched myself at him, getting him good across the cheek. I heard him hiss, and couldn’t help but hiss myself. Which was odd…. What am I?
“What did you do to me?” I asked in a voice full of malice.
“Don’t be that way darling.” He said, touching his cheek. “I just made you like me, so that we could be together.”
“And what exactly is ‘like you’?” I asked, grabbing the front of his shirt.
He grinned at me, and that grin made me want to throw up then and there. “Why, a vampire of course.”
“What?!” I shrieked, shaking him. And then I realized; I shouldn’t have been able to shake him. He was easily, from his height, over two hundred pounds. I dropped him in shock, staring down at my hands.
“Come with me darling, I can show you how wonderful your new immortal life will be.” He walked forward and moved to drape his arm over my shoulder.
I slipped under it, and climbed onto his back again, getting him into another chokehold. “Hell no.” I muttered.
To my horror, he laughed. “I knew you were perfect. Stubborn and defiant, feisty even.”
“Shut up!” I screamed in his ear, and then I did something I never thought I would do; I tore his throat out.
Or I tried to.
I missed slightly, but I still got the satisfaction of making him scream.
He grabbed my wrists and unlocked them from around his neck, pulling me in front of him.
“Not a good idea darling,” Dimitri said acidly, right in my face. He was holding me up by my wrists.
I hissed, and kicked my legs at him.
He hissed back, and it sounded much more menacing than mine had. Shifting me so that he was holding both my wrists in one hand, he put the other on the small of my back.
I screamed, really screamed. His hand burned on my back, his nails digging into my skin.
When the pain finally ended, I felt numb.
“I’ll be back for you darling. You will always be mine, never forget.” He whispered in my ear. He kissed my cheek, and then he was gone. I was on the floor, and I could feel a cool breeze on my back, where he had touched it. It must have burned through my pajamas….
I heard sirens, and then there were police everywhere. They were shouting things to each other.
“Two dead!”
“What’s that on her back?!”
“I don’t know. It’s a wonder she’s still alive.”
“She must’ve been the one the neighbors heard screaming. They said it was horrible, like she was in agony.”
“Strangest break in I’ve ever seen!”
I felt a tear roll down my cheek.
They eventually put me on a gurney, on my stomach, due to the burns on my back.
I remained in a daze through the whole ambulance ride to the hospital. I could barely feel something cold being rubbed on my back.
“That’s definitely going to scar…” I heard one of the doctors say.
“Yeah, and it’s in such a pattern… It must have taken forever to get it to look like that… no wonder she was screaming so much….”
“Better put her on anesthesia…”
The anesthesia worked quickly, I fell asleep and forgot everything.