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Amazing What A Break Up Does
In all my life ._. I couldnt ever imagine being without you for more than 2 days. In a way it sounds a bit pathetic, but it shows how much I depend on you. I need you there because without you, then everything else it just empty.
You think I took you for granted, and in a way you're half right. At times yes, I did take you for granted. However, you should know that I knew I could lose you at any second. I knew that you deserved better than me. I knew one day you might not be there.
But, I didn't think it would happen. Which is where my naive trait kicks in.
I kinda understand why you play those harsh jokes on me now. To make me realize a reality that it can happen. And its a test. To see how I would react to it on certain occasions. Each time you've done that joke its been different. One scenario - I was being played. Second - I dressed/acted like a whore ect.
Now, its my reality. =/
we're broken up...
I remember last time we broke up. I really thought you were taking it fine. Only to find out later. You suffered.
I'm not sure about this time. But, I'm glad you're happy about getting your new laptop. I'm depressed (more depressed w/e lol) but i'll be sure to put on a smile for you everyday. Though we've gone our separate ways it doesn't mean I'm gonna give up on any promises. I won't drink. I won't smoke. I wont hurt myself. I'm not gonna cheat. I'm gonna do better in school. I'm always gonna be there for you. (Rather you like it or not). Our bets are still in play. (One of the ones I havent let you win yet >__> wink
Hehe its hard looking at the things you gave me. =>
Fatty, your letters, your jacket, your keychain, your wallet, your necklace.
I hug Fatty a lot closer/more than I used to. I feel thats the only thing I can do to remain close to you ^-^. Your letters I read almost every night. Your necklace is under my pillow.
Of course, I'm not ready at all to let you go. Nope. And well...I don't plan to.
Mike wanted to hit you/choke you/ect. lol I said no ._. and he started naming more stuff and we finally deciding that he can throw ONE, one dictionary at you. Lol IN FRONT OF YOU. Which im hoping you'll catch. Lol which is why i said yes too that! Heh =)
I'll be good for you. =)
Try to be good for me. Even if it's just a little <3
Writing this....typing this. Makes me feel a little better. Me continuing to cry doesn't do anything. Though it feels better ^-^;;. (Crying takes a lot outta you ._.)
But yes <3
Forever yours Honey!
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