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well i really hope that no one reads these, at least this one. i feel so bad. i told myself that i wouldn't do it, but i did, i cut my chest. but at least i didn't as deep as i wanted too. if i did, i would have a big scar. but instead i only did a few little cuts, just deep enough to show blood, but then i stopped myself there. damn it, i hate this. i feel so bad. damn it all to hell!!