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I don't know any more...I don't know what to say to people I don't know what to do.The only thing I can do is sit and wait.Everything is quiet now.The rest of the state is asleep...heh,I wonder if some one is dreaming of me.I have many secrets and some of them I make to much out of.I hate hiding things from people...But everyone needs there own secrets if they hope to survive in this world.

It's amusing how it seems the shadows dance around my room at night.I lay awake,watching them in the darkness of the night.Like an army coming for me but never getting here.It frightens me,the shifting of the usually still darkness.Each night brings fear,the nightmares return and I would do anything to make them stop.Each night I am forced to watch everything I live for taken from me in a flurry of screams and blood.My mind knows more than it should on the subject of pain.I've caused so much to others,maybe this is some higher power getting back at me.Or maybe it is just myself hating what I was and still subconsciously trying to make sure I'm never that again.

I know me words make little sense...But in the dead of night,in your darkest nightmares.You will know of what I speak.I'm not sure about anything any more...Fear and sadness cloud my judgment.I know that this sounds like the ramblings of a psychopath but this is my life at night and I fear the night now more than ever.The dreams seeming to be longer and longer.They replay each night from the same beginning and they are the same until when the last one ends this next continues.my head hurts now so I will stop.I just don't know any more.