December 23, 2010 Thursday 11:01PM
My dearest Sennyo,
I saw Nucc again today. Our 16th meeting. He arrived around 1:25PM today, and we then left to Arby's shortly after his arrival. We came back with around an hour to kill before leaving to the Regal Theater in Deerfield. We napped in my room and nommed. When looking at my stomach, he asked if a scar was a new one. One I had made around last week. He asked if I would tell him what it was about. I said it was nothing. Honestly. I'm fine. I said. He didn't believe me, and asked if I could tell him later. Maybe, I said, if I can recall it. I kissed his forehead.
Black Swan was an amazing movie. Always interesting, yet not in the way that an action film is.
We then left to Kyojin to meet the family there for dinner. We had around 15-20 minutes left before they arrived at the restaurant, so we stayed in his car. After talking a bit about silly things we were quiet for a short while.
"(Now) this is just a wild guess, but the [last two times you cut] it was [after/a few days after] an a**-call [I had with him on the phone]. [Is that why?]"
I said it wasn't that. That I couldn't remember.
It broke my heart, saying that. Would he think of me as crazy, for doing it because of that? Being so angry at myself for calling him and trying to small talk when he clearly wanted out. A nine minute call exact.
"I don't believe you."
"I can't remember. I'm sorry."
"I still don't believe you." he gently said, a small grin on his face, trying to calm and persuade me.
I said something like "It's okay, my love." And kissed his forehead.
The guilt kills me now.
We went to dinner, went back home and up to my bedroom. Gave him his presents. He liked the 70% dark chocolate Russel Stover chocolates. And he replaced his old wallet with the new one I bought him right there. He gave me his old one. My parents gave him his new watch.
I could feel my heart breaking when I lied to him like that.
He left. I love him so.
I was thinking about calling him and telling him the truth, but when he got home today at 11:12PM he said that he was going to bed. It'll have to wait until tomorrow then.
I love him so, Sennyo. I really do. I love him.
[End Log] 11:29PM
Poison Fairy Sennyo Community Member 
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