I think that it was in December because there was a lot snow every where. As always I was attacked by a demon. However this time when I used my power it simply deflected it. It backed me into a corner and I couldn’t do anything about it. So I figured it was now or never. I cast a spell - my very first spell. It was “Iparus” a flame spell. With it I made a ball of fire appear in my hand. The demon and I both stared at it and it burnt by hand. I flinched, it went flying and it hit the demon. Once it did it grew and killed him as I stood there and watched in utter shock.
It was a complete accident but amazingly it had worked. I had expected it to but it did. It was beyond amazing, it surpassed spectacular. It was utterly indescribable. The rush of magic for the very first time. The way it felt has no words. I stood there in the snow for hours probably all that it no longer seemed like time mattered all that much. I was more than happy, sailing far past ecstasy. I could tell when I cast that first spell that this was what I was meant to do. At the age of four I knew what I was going to be doing for the rest of my life. And I did do it my entire life. And Duke, I did love it. Always in my hear I held a deep love for what I did and for my magic even when it made my life horrible. I loved protecting people and using my powers.
Do you know what I find so amazing? How much those moments still affect me today. Like the weather. When the weather that happened at those moments in my life reoccur in the present day I still feel a rush of what I did back then. For one thing the day when I first attack it was, cliché enough, raining and thundering. So even to this day when I hear thunder it scares me shitless. I absolutely hate it. You know how I used to spend most of my nights growing up at my room in Goldman and Trent? Well I told everyone that it was because I didn’t want to be around my parents. That was partly true. As mortals they didn’t know my secret and so I found it hard to be around them. But back then things were still relatively good between us.
The reason was that we live in Indiana and therefore it rains a lot so usually I was too terrified to walk home. In fact there have been many nights throughout my life where I skipped out on my patrol duties because there was a storm out and I didn’t feel up to it. But I could never let anyone know that. I was always the brave one. I had to be, for all of those around me who depended on that courage. So I could never tell anyone that some as ordinary as thunder could scare me so much. That’s why I always found it so odd that Mark, my twin brother, is the Mage of Thunder.
And I never told anyone, ever. I kept that fear inside of me and pretended that I never had it. And it wasn’t easy but I did it for all the people that I gathered here for this war. I had to be fearless for them and for you. No one could ever be allowed to know that I was just as scared as everyone else was; that things frightened me too. So now you know that thunder always scared me and so I seem like a complete coward you also know why it did.
On the same note snow always made me happy. Because it was snowing when I cast that first spell so many years ago. So just the smell of it can fill with me joy. And I hope with all my heart that you have something that can kick start you heart and your memories to give the same reaction. I hope that there is something out there for you, Duke, that makes you think of the first spell that you cast. And by now I’ve been writing for a while so do me a favor and take a quick break and go to the bathroom.
 Zegwarian310 · Thu Mar 13, 2008 @ 08:13am · 2 Comments |
