[SRP] Blinded by ... Fear (Gaston x B'Elanna) *fin*

[tefla]

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We've all heard it before. "Don't be a chicken. As if facing your fears was the most natural and easy thing in the world (spoiler: that's a hard no). This month we'd love to see one of your soquili have to face up to a challenge by accident or on purpose. Is your soquili afraid to confess their love to a certain someone? Do jellyfish make them tremble in fear so much that it keeps them from the water? Is there an adversary that needs standing up to? This month, we want you to take a stand against something. Don't have any cowards? Maybe your soquili *is* the fear that another is standing up to.

 

[tefla]

There was a time, not so long ago, that Gaston would have dreamed of the importance of this day. But in between the then of the past of the now of the present; things had changed drastically. He still hadn't come clean to B'Elanna about his life-altering injury that he had sustained. For all he could assume, maybe B'Elanna just believed that Gaston could see perfectly fine through the cloth that concealed his eyes. The truth though was for all intents and purposes Gaston was truly never going to see again. There was no amount of healing magic that would restore his sight and it was only through intense memorization of the surrounding terrain that he was able to move with a cool confidence. But it was all just an act, a farce, a lie.

How would Gaston even begin to explain this affliction to B'Elanna? Would it change how she had come to view him? Would it threaten the happiness they had seemingly been able to find? Each had risked something personal in their respective journeys and now it seemed as if it might all come crashing down because he'd not come clean about things. On this day above all Gaston was ready to admit and commit to a life with B'Elanna, if she'd accept all that he was and all that he'd lost.  

[tefla]

There was an air of impatience in her movement. B'Elanna knew the place that she had agreed to meet with Gaston was just up ahead but what she wasn't sure about was why he wanted it so far out of the way. Her mind was trying to figure out just what reasoning he could have had for requiring such a distance to be travelled before merely shaking her head in exasperation. She would never fully understand the need to be away from prying eyes. Maybe that was just it. Perhaps it was that Gaston did not care to have an audience watching his every move. It was true that in the time that they'd both been guests of the unicorn mare Lyrical Sky that her old friend from before never cared to have so many eyes watching his every move.

It was perplexing to say the least considering the blindfold that the stallion continued to sport. The caramel-coated mare had never seen Gaston without the blindfold on and she figured that maybe it was just a fashion statement of some sort. There were times that she wondered about her assumptions that maybe something else was at play but she never questioned the thought and she never brought the topic up.

But on this day the mare was slightly irritated at the distance that she had to put in just to meet up with the burly stallion. They could have easily held the meeting closer to Sky's refuge.  

[tefla]

The clatter of hooves over rocky terrain was caught by swivelling ears. Gaston didn't need the whispered words from his fox familiar either to know that suddenly he was not alone anymore. Raven had been a blessing in disguise for as much as she helped him out with tricky navigation with agreed upon signals that he could follow but she essentially was as stubborn as he was. Maybe it's why they got along as well as they did.

For now Gaston ignored the fox and focused on the familiar sounding tread of a mare he'd come to care deeply for. What amazed him was that it seemed that B'Elanna was returning these feelings. Even as she approached and moved to gently nuzzle his side did the stallion heave a sigh of relief. The touch lingered for a few seconds longer before Gaston felt B'Elanna pull away. He coughed hastily before moving forward to return the gesture before awkwardness set in. Already he could feel the nerves he thought were up to this task begin to fail him.

"B'Elanna ... no... Belle, thank you for agreeing to meet me all the way out here. There are things we need to discuss."  

[tefla]

"B'Elanna ... no... Belle, thank you for agreeing to meet me all the way out here. There are things we need to discuss."

If those words had been uttered by any other individual B'Elanna would have rolled her eyes in derision. But this was not just another individual, this was Gaston. A stallion she had known for as long as she could remember. Never before had she heard the level of seriousness in his voice as she did now. Her ears pricked forward before she awaited whatever words the stallion was going to speak next for there was definitely a matter of great importance taking place. Her eyes picked out the flash of grey and white standing just behind the stallion and her gaze narrowed before the fox ducked out of her direct line of sight. While not the strangest thing she had come to see while in these lands she had never expected Gaston to be the type to be able to bond with a familiar. She huffed silently before flicking her tail. She wasn't going to be the one to judge, truth was, she had found herself a friend as well. But she could tell that Gaston was stalling and she finally had enough.

"Gaston, whatever you want to say - just say it. I don't want to be waiting out here forever. As you wanted to meet away from prying eyes I assume it's something important. Just spit it out."

Her tone softened as she tried to break through whatever wall he was hiding behind, "c'mon ... it's just you and me out here. It can't be that serious, can it?"  

[tefla]

The harshness of B'Elanna's initial outburst almost caused Gaston to recoil in shock. This was an extreme reaction and nothing like the young mare that he used to know. It startled him more than he cared to admit. Although the tone that his childhood friend used afterwards seemed to be softer and more in line to how Gaston remembered her. Perhaps it was the journey to meet away from mostly prying eyes that had B'Elanna being snippy with him. He shifted awkwardly and conceded that he'd have been the same way.

"Sorry, sorry. I'm still not used to all of this. I appreciate that you took time to come and meet with me. There's something that I've wanted to tell you since we reunited in these strange lands but I've been too afraid to even think about how you would react. I'm still afraid of what your reaction will be. It's been constantly eating away at what self-esteem I have left."

Gaston swung his head to where he had assumed B'Elanna was positioned. The fact that they had exchanged brief nuzzles earlier meant nothing but remembering where her irritated voice had sounded from made it a relatively assured guess.

"There are two things that I've been afraid to admit to myself ... and by extension to you."

Gaston inhaled deeply before releasing the breath slowly, as if he were attempting to calm his anxiousness. He struggled to find the words that needed to be said. When they came, his voice was quieter and yet more firm in their conviction. "My first admission to you Belle is this: I love you. Although we may not have seen eye to eye in the past ... I feel that on some level the journey that we both took changed us. It's made us more than who were as our younger selves," here Gaston took in the silence from the area before sighing. "You may or may not feel the same but I had to get that admission out into the open - for it's the truth."  

[tefla]

""There are two things that I've been afraid to admit to myself ... and by extension to you." ....

"My first admission to you Belle is this: I love you. Although we may not have seen eye to eye in the past ... I feel that on some level the journey that we both took changed us. It's made us more than who were as our younger selves,"

He loved her? He LOVED her! That wasn't at all possible, was it? Gaston was the one she least expected to love her. B'Elanna backpedalled a little before ceasing her motions. Yes the reveal was unexpected or was it? Settling her nerves over the admission the caramel coated mare tilted her gaze to the side before sighing softly. Realizing that Gaston was probably waiting to have it thrown back in his face Belle cautiously chose her next action carefully before approaching the burly stallion. It was true that he must've seen some hardship when they had been separated but mostly he was the same stallion. Reaching out she gently touched his neck with her muzzle before closing her eyes, "I think deep down I knew this day would eventually come. I think I've loved you for the longest time. But why now? What's changed?"

Belle's voice was soft as she continued to allow herself to just be in the moment. Feeling Gaston pull away from the contact she gave an inquiring glance towards the unexpected movement before realizing that he was trembling. She then remembered the words from before. He had two admissions to admit to her and she froze. The fox from before had returned and Gaston was lowering his head towards the animal. B'Elanna watched with intrigue at the gentle ministrations as the fox essentially loosened the fabric that covered Gaston's eyes. What was going on here?  

[tefla]

Hearing that B'Elanna didn't reject his declaration of love was the signal that Raven had been waiting for. Inwardly Gaston knew that this next reveal would be the hardest one yet. Even as he felt Belle gently rest her muzzle on his side and her murmured words could not subside the trembling that had wracked his frame at what had to be revealed next. Even as he caught the sounds of Raven's return did he step a small distance away from the mare that he'd believed would never return his feelings (but she did) to engage with the fox. Lowering his head to Raven's level did Gaston feel the fox gently begin to pull at the looser-than-normal knot that kept the blindfold across his damaged eyes. He still inwardly cursed Kumiho for what she had done but that was hopefully staying in the past.

As he felt the fabric loosen and flutter away did the stallion suck in the hugest amount of air. This was going to be hard to get over. There was no way getting around that Belle needed to know what was going on. Honesty would be the best thing going forward and he couldn't hide this from her ...

Raising his head to Gaston turned his neck into B'Elanna's direction and heard an audible gasp from the mare before he lowered his head. "The second truth that I admit to you today, my dearest Belle, is that I'm without any vision. It's been this way since before we were reunited. Another mare sought to ensure that I'd never see any other face but hers was seared into my mind when she took my sight from me. I'm sorry that I kept this a secret ... but it's been eating at me since Lyrical Sky brought you around to her cave. I don't know why it took me so long to admit these things out loud but I guess I was scared of how you would react. I still am scared that you'll run now."  

[tefla]

She couldn't help the gasp that escaped from her. Even as Gaston started to speak did B'Elanna take a step back from the horror that she had witnessed in that one brief, yet, unforgettable reveal. How had the stallion managed to hide this from her for so long? How long had he been without his sight? Why did something like this hurt her so much? Even as the words that had been spoken wind their way into her thought processes did B'Elanna stall her backwards motion. She had just admitted that she had loved the stallion and now with this new twist she could feel her heart clench in abject terror. Was it terror for herself, terror for Gaston or terror for whatever future they would have together?

"The second truth that I admit to you today, my dearest Belle, is that I'm without any vision. It's been this way since before we were reunited. Another mare sought to ensure that I'd never see any other face but hers was seared into my mind when she took my sight from me. I'm sorry that I kept this a secret ... but it's been eating at me since Lyrical Sky brought you around to her cave. I don't know why it took me so long to admit these things out loud but I guess I was scared of how you would react. I still am scared that you'll run now."

The fact that Gaston thought that she would run even now proved just how well that they truly knew each other. Inwardly B'Elanna wasn't sure she wasn't fond of the idea of not being the last thing that Gaston had "seen" but the past couldn't be changed. She would just have to make sure that the love of her life would have to paint new images of what she currently looked like. Stepping forward lightly once again did Belle rest her muzzle against Gaston's long neck. Her voice was hardly audible as she gave a restless sigh.

"I cannot believe you kept these secrets for so long. I can only imagine the inner turmoil that you have been going through since I returned into your life. Please though Gaston, don't shut me out again. I've told you how I feel and you should know this that I will never run from anything that you have to tell me. We are going to be in this relationship together for the long haul and trust will be the rock that we build our life together on."

B'Elanna gave a low sigh of contentment as she draped her neck across the stallion's. She wouldn't run. Not now, not ever.  

[tefla]

"I cannot believe you kept these secrets for so long. I can only imagine the inner turmoil that you have been going through since I returned into your life. Please though Gaston, don't shut me out again. I've told you how I feel and you should know this that I will never run from anything that you have to tell me. We are going to be in this relationship together for the long haul and trust will be the rock that we build our life together on."

Gaston's heart was soaring. Or it felt like it was. He felt B'Elanna's muzzle rest against his neck and even as her words reached his ears did the stallion let out the breath that he'd been holding onto in a great big sounding whoosh. Not only did B'Elanna respond to his declaration of love with one of her own but she also didn't run with the reveal of his life-changing injury that he had sustained. Even as words such as relationships and trust went through his mind did Gaston truly come to realize that if he hadn't acted on this deep-seated fear of rejection from one he had truly cared about then this moment would not have occurred.

Standing straighter than he thought possible Gaston returned Belle's gentle gestures with some of his own as he contemplated what the future might hold for them now. Even if he couldn't see ... his imagination supplied rosy images of things that could be expected down the road. For once in his life Gaston was truly hopeful that things had worked out for the best.