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 Posted: Thu Nov 08, 2018 12:03 pm
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It had been some few months that he had finally succumbed to Ladon and his newly found granddaughter and agreed, at last, to come back to the fold. Life among the Mwezi'Johari felt most days like it had not changed at all since he had parted from the lands and then other days, like today, he could not shake the overwhelming feeling that he did not belong there. Without Alcmene at his side, without her steadfast love and the way her eyes saw the world, that 'home' was little more than an extension of the rogue lands.
It felt empty.
Most of the time he could ignore it and force his smile as old faces and new alike greeted him, as they plied the once King with pleasantries and questions, false niceties and reassurances. Yet there were days that it compounded, that the alien feeling was amplified by his inability to plaster a fake smile onto his face, and when he could no longer take that feeling he always found his paws carrying him out and away into the true empty, nothing of the rogue lands.
At least here he was no one and there were never expectations of what he did or how he behaved with others. He did not want to incur the ire of his otherwise king and understanding pride, he only wanted to be left alone with the heartache he could not rid himself of. The old blue lion would have liked to say he had tried to dampen his own guilt for the sake of his family but he hadn't - he wanted to carry it as a reminder. So long as he felt guilty a part of her would be with him forever.
A deep, heavy sigh escaped him as he pulled his eyes down from the moonless sky. Even the Great Lion did not want to look upon him this night. He should have been more careful without his eyes to follow him but there was a freedom in it, he found. He lowered his maw to the small watering hole he had noticed only by the reflection of the glittering stars.
In the darkness there was comfort, no reason to pretend.
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Posted: Fri Nov 30, 2018 11:29 am
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Leaving Yorshka behind was never easy, after everything the pair had shared together over the past few weeks the pale Goddess found herself longing to be with her children once more. It was a natural desire, one a mother often felt when all of her cubs had left home and started families of their own. Most days felt like weeks when she found herself without the company of family or kin, life almost felt meaningless without anyone back home. This bleak realization had hit Zimran hard on her travels back from the Stormborn lands, it had settled deep into her chest like cold stone, perpetually weighing her down.
Zimran didn't want to be alone.
The Goddess was happy for her daughter, who she had just given away in marriage, yet, an uneasiness started to crawl against the back of her mind. What would happen to her when she returned home? Would the emptiness of her den be too much to live with? A soft frown crossed her lips as the female stopped beside a watering hole, tall tress lay scattered around the pond, cradling the dark sky above. The night felt like a blanket as the Goddess settled herself to sit down beside the water's edge, sighing deeply, her mind still full of regrets and self-pity.
Slowly bright eyes would settled on the figure of another, a male she had not noticed upon arriving settling herself down for a drink. He stood silent and still, seemingly alone. The Goddess reached out with a soft voice, speaking. "I wonder where the moon went?" Zimran's tone was small, yet it traveled far enough for him to hear. The Goddess did not walk in mortal skin, though she hardly resembled a Divine, it felt like a bother pretending to be something she wasn't. The only thing that set her apart from mortals was the single horn that grew from her forehead.
"I am sorry if I intruded, I had not noticed you at first. If I had, I might have kept going, I know that solitude can be so soothing. If you need me to leave I can do that for you." She spoke with sincerity and a deep smile.
White dipped paws settled to as the Goddess sat still and waited for the male to respond. She would take no offence, if this lion wanted to be alone Zimran would gladly continue on.
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Posted: Mon Dec 03, 2018 5:21 pm
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Though the old male would not deny that there was a little disappointment ovre the interruption of his solitude, it was not in him to be unkind or rude even to a stranger. His heart had been large and even now when it hung so heavy and wounded, he could not muster even an ounce of ill will or snap to rid himself of the uninvited intrusion. Instead, he sat up and wiped a paw across his lower jaw, ridding the thick fur of his beard and lower mane from residual water.
"No, no," he shook his head and pulled his best, pleasant smile onto his slate-grey face, "you are not a bother at all, Miss-"
Yet, the longer he stared at her, really stared at her, the more peculiar her being seemed to him. At first she was just the average female, perhaps with flowing hair a bit longer and more lustrous than most wandering rogues, and a pleasantly pale pelt that stood out even in this darkest of nights, but average none-the-less. Then she drew closer to him and he could not pull his gaze away from the glimmering horn that lingered upon her forehead - a decoration? No. There was nothing to hold it there. It was firmly attached and that, of all thing, meant..
"Sorry," he dipped his head politely, "please make yourself at peace here if you wish."
Though they were a pride devoted to the Great Lion, Fafnir's time spent among the rogue lands had taught him a great many things. First and foremost was that there were others that roamed this land, with powers and might like none could even imagine, and though he had yet to exactly discern what relation they had to the Great Lion himself, he had no doubt they were something of his making. Why, after all, she was almost as beautiful as the moon given flesh. How could she not have been His?
"I can find solitude another time."
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Posted: Fri Dec 07, 2018 1:10 pm
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Slowly the pale Goddess moved closer, speaking as bright blue eyes settled upon his figure softly. "-thank you, I won't be long." as Zimran found her place beside the waters edge she spoke again, this time with soft nod in his direction. "I'm sure you won't have to look far, solitude is longing for company." It was easy to joke about something she could relate to, this was after all the first time in moths the Goddess had even allowed herself to smile, fate had been unkind and unjust, while Zimran could enjoy herself she would.
"My daughter was married off just the other day." The Divine creature spoke as her eyes withdrew from his face, turning away in disappointment. "-and though I should feel joy deep inside my bones I can not help but worry-" a pause came swiftly, followed by a soft chuckle. "Perhaps my own experiences with love has jaded me, hardened me to such a joyous event?"
Her white masked face settled on the water as it pooled around one of her paws. "-I would like to think her ending will be better than my own." For a long second the Goddess sat in silence, searching the deepest parts of her mind, longing for resolve and release. Silently the Goddess sat, finding very little peace in her deepest thoughts.
"Sometimes I wonder if I am cursed-- or damned?" Slowly her eyes met his once more as blush swept along her face, the depth of her embarrassment easily seen.
"Forgive me. I haven't been able to speak freely for a while now, not without upsetting my children." Zimran glanced back down at her paws, unable to face the blue lion with a straight face. Perhaps being honest with a stranger wasn't her brightest idea.
"-Solitude was better company, I'm sure."
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Posted: Sun Jan 13, 2019 3:09 pm
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Damn it all, but his heart, even broken as it was, twisted as she spun a story of heartache and worry. It echoed too closely to his own fate; he had lost his great love and deprived his son of the ability to settle down and find happiness for himself. It layered guilt atop his own, endless grief and he was not sure that he would ever forgive himself for inadvertently causing pain to Ladon or anyone else.
"No, no," he murmured, shaking his great head and sending his pale mane tossing around his slate blue face, "do not worry over it. I understand all too well what it feels like to assume you have done something to anger.. a higher power."
Fafnir tripped over the words at the end, uncertain how one spoke to such a creature as herself about The Great Lion. He would not forsake the almighty one but he did not want to offend either - "a higher power" seemed neutral enough.
"I have lived a long time too afraid to return home and too guilty to find peace elsewhere. When I was young and foolish, I married the love of my life, started a family, and we were endlessly happy. Happiness always has a way of making you let your guard down though." He frowned as the unbidden images of Alcmene returned to his mind; his eyes forced themselves closed and he grimaced lightly, a husband unable to banish the last sight of his slain wife. It would haunt him, forever.
Silence gripped him for a moment before he forced his pale eyes open again, looking up to find her. She was still there before him, at least. She wasn't something he had imagined.
"I lost her and I've never forgiven myself. Sometimes solitude is just an excuse for me to wallow in my grief alone because I don't know how to live without it now and it troubles my son."
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Posted: Wed Jan 16, 2019 12:47 pm
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Posted: Fri Jan 18, 2019 1:47 pm
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"I'm sorry," he murmured, though even he wasn't entirely sure what he was sorry for. Those two words encapsulated so many feelings and concerns; her tears, her losses, his indirect hand in worsening her mood for the time being. He sighed and pushed himself to his feet in a swift, graceful motion. His time back among his pride had done wonders in putting meat back on his bones and giving him an air of sophisticated, aging grace.
"I didn't mean to make you cry, you shouldn't worry yourself over my losses." The smile he offered her was weak, but he managed it none-the-less. If there was one thing in the world that Fafnir could not take, much less cause, it was a good soul worrying over that which they could not control. Perhaps it was hypocritical given the weight he carried upon his own shoulders but it was beyond him to see such a similarity. He was still just the bleeding heart that had wanted to make a Princess happy. "You might be right but I won't ever stop missing her. I think we aren't meant to let go of that ache; it is the only piece of them we can carry with us forever."
"I think that's enough dwelling for tonight, though." His shoulders rolled in a shrug before he dipped his head deeply, bowing his upper body in a fanciful display of greeting that showed off the long line of his spine and the scale markings that denoted his heritage.
"I'm Fafnir, of the Mwezi'Johari."
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Posted: Tue Jan 22, 2019 4:54 pm
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"You didn't, I promise. These tears are traces of a past long gone. I need to let them go."
He was right, no one really had time for tears, that much was true. Over all the years the Goddess had lived she knew very little of pain and suffering, so when she was finally forced to live through something traumatic the horned creature feel victim to apathy and turned to sorrow. This wasn't going to solve her current situation, and he was be very understanding. Slowly the Goddess nodded before her eyes followed his and circled the ground. He helped bring her back down to this place here, in the moment.
"Zimran," the Goddess smiled the best she could, glancing back toward him timidly. "Goddess of Purity."
She found it hard to smile at first, but slowly one started to creep across her pale face.
"Fafnir, of the Mwezi'Johari, It's been a pleasure so far, thank you for keeping this old soul company." her voice was welcoming and light as the Goddess placed a paw beside her, motioning for him to sit beside her.
"You are right - let's not look to the past, at least for tonight. Would you keep me company while I watch the stars?"
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Posted: Tue Jan 22, 2019 5:03 pm
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For a moment, Fafnir wanted to tell her that she was not that old but caught his tongue. He knew nothing of these other worldly beings that called themselves gods and even if his mind and body felt older than she appeared he knew that it could all be farce. Questioning her about it felt like a betrayal to the Great Lion and a hole that he might not be able to pull himself back from. Instead, he just smiled and pushed himself forward as she bid him to, contented with her presence as another creature that walked this earth.
"Purity," he murmured, thinking it a great lark that such a beautiful creature would have found him, of all souls. "I am not sure what I have done to deserve your company tonight, lady, but I would enjoy it none the less."
He settled next to her, contented, and let his belly lower to meet the ground as his eyes rolled up to the dazzling, glinting stars stretched far above his head in every direction. He never tired of them. Every night felt like a new one, no matter how many of the constellations he recognized.
"I will keep you company so long as you'll have me, lady. I've no reason to be anywhere but here."
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Posted: Tue Jan 22, 2019 5:37 pm
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The silence between the two felt less frightening than it once might have felt, under any other circumstance she would have left, finding her own way back home in the middle of the dark, however, finding a kindred spirit was a rare occurrence and tonight it felt like just that; the meeting of two lost souls, souls that understood the meaning of love lost and heartache.
She found comfort here beside him as the Goddess settled herself close, close enough to feel his warmth and touch. It was something she missed, something so familiar she could feel those tears hit her again and in that moment her eyes reached the stars, never allowing another tear to shed for a past that now behind her. A past she would never be able to reach.
Meeting Fafnir was a work of fate, it had to be. Zimran wouldn't ever dare question fate, not on a night this beautiful. Slowly her eyes settled back to his face as she searched him over once before speaking a final time, her words sound and true. "Stay with me tonight. Like this, I miss this feeling."
A fleeting moment was still a moment to celebrate, and celebrate she would.
If only for tonight.
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