Kasai - bold
Lately Yorshka had gone out of her way to avoid Aldan as much as she possibly could. She kept her head low and her conversations to a bare minimum, and at nighttime the female slept by herself. The lioness found it hard to face Aldan after everything she said, even if she was upset he didn't deserve it. Yorshka knew it. So, like a shrinking violet lioness hid herself away, ashamed of her actions. Oh how she longed to be invisible.
One morning while Aldan slept the female tip-toed her way past him. heading outside before sunrise. Her paws took her far from the shared den and down to the shore. She wanted to watch the waves fade in and out. She wanted to see the sunrise. She wanted to feel free.
Aldan, in all his anger had returned the gift that she gave him. He must have despised her. Yorshka deserved it, she knew it. This haunted her. This kept her up at night. She would watch him sleep from the corner of her eye, hoping one night he would forgive her and sleep beside the lioness again. Silence was all that answered...silence felt so loud.
Slowly the lioness walked until her paws touched the waves, foam forming around her forearms as the tide rolled in and out, swaying against gently the wind. Something here felt so cathartic tears started to creep down her white cheeks, still, she wouldn't allow anyone to see her like this. Yorshka needed to be strong. Weakness would get her killed.
Yorshka's paws took her deeper, stopping as soon as waves crashed against her chest. In her maw she held her silver pendant, it's blue stone floating in the water as the female carried it with her deeper into the sea. This trinket meant nothing now. It was no longer a reminder of her mother, but a symbol of her failures, a dark mark she would carry with her for the rest of her life. Or at least... one she assumed she would. Yorshka's judgement was clouded. Sorrow was a wicked and blinding thing.
Sand held her firm as the ocean woke, sending wave after wave until her body was pushed back from shear force. The sun had started to rise and for the first time in a long time the female greeted the morning with a smile. Even if the lioness couldn't forgive herself she knew this needed to happen. Aldan no longer cared for her... she had nothing to lose. So, with a deep sigh her clenched teeth went loose as the pendant she carried started to float away with the tide.
This was the right thing to do. It was better to kill the past and her feelings. How else was she going to survive here? For a moment this logic felt sound, for a moment she simply watched as the trinket started to sink into the sea.
"..." If only apathy could keep her from being impulsive. Almost as soon as the trinket vanished under the waves the lioness felt a panic sink in and heartache took over. No. This wasn't right. She couldn't. Quickly the lioness plunged into the rising tide, frantically searching the ocean floor for her necklace. The water wasn't deep enough to carry her out to sea, but it was deep enough to feel crushing as waves toppled against her pale figure.
Yorshka would gasp as she resurfaced before the female dove back in. With each unsuccessful dive she could feel her heart sink. The lioness would repeat this process until she found her pendant, grasping it tightly with a paw. Quickly she swam back to shore, coughing up her lungs as her body fell roughly against the shore. Sand covered her like a blanket as the lioness rolled onto her side, breathing in deeply. Her paw clutched her necklace tightly.
She couldn't let it go. She couldn't let him go.
It wasn't that Aldan was trying to ignore Yorshka. Okay...well maybe he was. She couldn't see past her rank, and could only view a title and nothing more. The thought sickened the wing-marked male. Why did it matter what she was, if someone loved her so?
Perhaps the two's interpretation of love were both skewed. What if what Pridelanders saw was different than those of the Stormborn. Would that mean they could never be together?
The longing thoughts turned into dreams and nightmares as he slept. He missed the warmth she brought to his bed at night, but he didn't foresee that happening any time soon. Not while she considered herself property.
Aldan didn't wake when Yorshka snuck out. It was only the small pulsation of his head that woke up. "What?" He muttered, rubbing his skull as he looked around. The den was empty.
Yorshka!
His eyes widened. Where did she go? The male jumped to his feet in an instant, quickly exiting the den. He sniffed the air. No Kristanf. He hadn't stolen her. Then where? what?
His eyes narrowed as he caught track of her scent, following his nose to the beach, where he saw the female struggling in the water, diving under the waves multiple times, before she seemed to retrieve what she was looking for. By the time Aldan reached the shore, the lioness was out of the water, catching her breath amongst the sand.
Aldan approached her slowly, his eyes still in a glare as he watched her.
"What the hell do you think you were doing?!" He snarled, hovering over the former pridelander. Aldan wasn't one to show anger, but his fear of what could have happened to Yorshka was rearing the ugly emotion from him. "You better have a good answer." He demanded, tail thrashing behind him as he stared down at his thrall.
Before the female was even able to compose herself Aldan hovered over her and demanded and a explanation. Wide eyes narrowed as she coughed once more, the wound on her side stung from the salt water but she ignored it. It was nothing compared to the pain she felt when the lioness looked at him. Honestly it was hard to look him directly in the eye so she did her best to shuffle ger gaze.
"I..." A lump in her throat kept her from speaking, still, Yorshka would try. She could see how upset he was.
"I can swim, I wasn't in any danger." Her reply was empty. The lioness didn't want to tell him what she was really doing with her morning. Not that he would care? Maybe telling him didn't matter.
"I needed to get my necklace." Again, a vague answer. This time it was followed with a defeated sigh. Her white paw opened as the silver necklace slipped from her grasp. "I found it, so everything is fine." The pale female wouldn't explain how the trinket ended up in the sea to begin with. All that mattered was that she was okay. He didn't need to know anything else... right?
Her figure still lay low, low enough that his shadow completely engulfed her figure. He made her feel so small now. Had he really grown that much?
"You can swim, so no danger. Everything is fine because you can swim. Mind you, no other dangers in this pride. All because you can swim." Aldan snapped, his anger unleashing. What if Kristanf had gotten to Yorshka? What if another, someone that could potential be worst than Kristanf had gotten to her. Aldan may have been grown, but how strong could he be to others in the pride. The feather earring should serve as a item that says she belongs to another, but how much do the pridemembers abide by those things? With the change in leadership, and the view in females already shifting towards a downward spiral, it was questionable.
"Get up. We are heading home." He ordered. "You are not to leave the den without my permission. Do I make myself clear?" The male asked, a frustrated sigh leaving his throat as he watched the female. The sun was slowly rising above the horizon.
Why was her pendant in the water in the first place? This was a question his heart wanted so desperately to ask, yet his brain kept him in no-nonsense mode right now. Maybe when his anger over the situation died down would he bring it up. The two needed to have a talk anyways about everything. Aldan didn't know if he could bring himself to do that just yet.
"I have company coming over later." He would say as they walked back. "I need the den cleaned."
He was barking orders at her for the first time ever, this shocked the pale lioness. Yorshka wanted to argue and fight back but when he spoke of a visitor her eyes narrowed in confusion. Clean? Was he honestly demanding she clean for him? The den was fine and cleaned, the lioness had made sure of it before he even returned. Was this some sort of punishment? Clearly he must have been mistaken, where did he get off treating her like this? How could he tell her he loved her and turn around and do something so demeaning? Her heart couldn't sink any deeper.
"Fine." Yorshka didn't even bother looking at him as she rolled herself back to her paws before walking past him as she made her way back to the den. Maybe Aldan never truly loved her at all? This... it didn't feel like love. So, she was just some thrall after all.
Bitterness set in as she entered the cave they shared, placing her necklace on a stone beside her pelts.
"I had cleaned before you came back home." Home, once she felt like she could be his home, but things felt so complicated now, this distortion brought soft tears to her eyes. Yorshka would hide them from Aldan at all costs, she wasn't going to giver him the satisfaction. If the male was trying to hurt the female he had succeeded. Why did things have to be this way.
Why was it so hard to say sorry?
The den wasn't really a mess. Yorshka had done a good job at cleaning it up while he was away. There were a few pelts scattered on the ground, but that was to be expected with two lions sleeping in the den. "I've been home for a little bit now. It needs cleaning again." The words sounded better in his head when he said it. He found himself mentally kicking himself.
Once they arrived at the den, Aldan waited for Yorshka to enter. "I'll be back later." He gave no time frame. He didn't know for himself. Instead, it was just an excuse to be separated from the female. The words she said to him earlier still hurt.
***
Aldan returned to the den a few hours later. In tow, his friend, K'i-lin, follow. He nudged the priestess, chuckling as she giggled as both entered the den. "Ah, good." Aldan said as he looked in the den, noting the cleanliness as well as Yorshka present in the back. At least she was a good listener about doing things he asked (ordered?).
"We're home." Aldan announced, glancing towards K'i-lin. His gaze returned back towards Yorshka. "K'i, this is my thrall, Yorshka." He exchanged the name. Without address Yorshka, he continued. "This is K'i-lin. She is a damn good priestess of the pride." The statement caused the kirin to slap Aldan playfully.
"Oh shhh. I owe it all to Datura," she cooed, eyes lighting up. "I didn't know you had a thrall?" Her head tilted as she smiled.
When Aldan returned with another female Yorshka's eyes went wide. She could feel her heart flutter, palpitations causing her eyes to feel heavy. They two flirted like old lovers, from the outward perceptive at least, this felt so wrong. His thrall? Had he really just introduced her as his thrall? Again the lioness found herself swimming at the deep end of her mind, dark thoughts slowly creeping in. They would make a home deep down inside Yorshka, holding her heart hostage with every word Aldan spoke.
The male never allowed her to speak, he just continued the introduction as if nothing she could say would matter. When the female placed a paw on Aldan freely Yorshka felt sick. The lioness couldn't help but question everything he ever said to her. Was it all for not? Had this been his goal all along? To bed her? Had Aldan decided he no longer cared for Yorshka because she rejected him?
The lioness hadn't even rejected him, at the time the female was simply lost in emotions she couldn't explain or understand, however, that didn't seem to cross Aldan's mind. He could be so thick sometimes.
He had no idea how much he was hurting the lioness, though.
At the visitors words she winched. A thrall.
That's what she was. The thing he was so mad at her for, her rank. Aldan had no issues throwing it in her face now. The lioness could hardly breathe.
"...." She said nothing. She didn't need to. Her face said it all. He crossed a line.
You know,” K’i-Lin has started. “My dad has a few thralls too. The last one gave him cubs,” the female hummed glancing at the pale female. She didn’t think Aldan the type like her father was. She had multiple siblings from different females, and she knew her father had been bedding one of the family thralls too. It was unlikely children would result from that union, due to the species difference.
“She’s really pretty~!” The lioness said in her sing song voice.
Aldan only nodded slightly, his gaze fixed on Yorshka’s reaction.
“Oh!” K’i’s eyes floundered to the wound on the other lioness. “That looks painful! I can get you some herbs for healing!” The Kirin said with a grin. “It won’t take too long!!”
“No, K’i that’s okay...” the gold priestess was notorious for making concoctions not suited for what she wanted. She meant well.
“Nonsense! I have perfected this one! I’ll be right back!” With that, the lioness left the den in a hurry, leaving the master and thrall alone again.
It would be a lie if Aldan said he didn’t notice the look Yorshka had given him. His heart sank.
“Yorshka...”
'No." Yorshka fumed as tears swelled in her eyes. Nothing the other lioness said even connected with her, no, the pale lioness was focused on Aldan, nothing else mattered, nothing else could cut so deep. With a wild gaze her ears pinned backwards in defense before she spoke out in defiance.
"You don't own me." Her words felt sharp and short.
"Don't. Don't speak my name." What she had gone through to be here like this, it was unspeakable. The amount of trauma she endured just to be beside him. If this was his true-self Yorshka wanted nothing to do with him.
"How stupid am I to have ever loved you?" The tears wouldn't stop, not now. She was past the point of splitting, the lioness was already torn in two. "...So stupid."
"...You can take this back." Again the lioness was acting out on impulse, it was hard not to with emotions so heightened her head spun in circles until the female couldn't think straight. The lioness brought a pale paw to her ear as she struggled to remove the feather from it, the bit of silver that held it tightly bound to her was stuck, making it unable to be removed the same was it was inserted. In all her anger Yorshka jerked the earring as hard as she could, pulling it until it tore pale flesh to be freed from her body. It wasn't like another wound was going to bother her now. The lioness couldn't see past her own sadness. It was chilling to witness.
Blood poured from her ear as she tossed the earring back at him. "Give it to your friend, I'm sure it would look better on her."
Pale eyes frantically searched his face as she swore under soft sobs. "I should have let the necklace sink." He wouldn't understand what that gift meant to her. How could he?
"--Have a goodnight Aldan." The lioness winched before she turned to exist the den. She couldn't be here, not like this. He had no idea how badly this hurt her and how much she cared. Yorshka would not watch him bed another female.
Aldan felt at a loss as Yorshka began to speak. Her words hit home. You don’t own me. Don’t speak my name. How stupid am I to have ever loved you. He felt his heart sinking even more. She had…loved him? Like he had loved her? Yet, she saw herself as property and thought he should have a more suited female. If he had known…
The demigod watched her struggle to get the earring off, wincing when she flat out tore it from her ear. He wanted to go over to her, to stop her, to help her, but he as stuck frozen in the moment, dark eyes shifting to the bloodied metal connecting his mother’s gift on the ground.
Give it to your friend. It would look better on her. That caught his attention. His gaze shifted back to her, as he saw her exiting the den.
Go after her. he pleaded to himself. Go! But he stood still, watching her form retreat from the den.
He headed for the fallen feather, lightly grasping it in his paws as he picked it up. “Stupid.” He muttered to himself, heaving the gift against the side of the den, hearing it clink to the ground. “Stupid.” He said again, this time swiping a paw at one of the pelts on the ground, it also sliding against the wall. “Stupid!” A final growl, claws unsheathing as they shredded one of his favorite pelts into strips.
K’i-lin had reentered the den, and noticed the missing lioness and the rather distraught male. She left the small pouch of healing herbs near the entrance, before leaving again. It was best not to disturb him.
Moments after the priestess had left, Aldan focused to the den’s entrance. He willed himself to follow the pale pridelander. He left the den, but instead of following her scent, he headed the opposite direction.
He had ruined everything.