How do you stop loving someone?

[White Siren Queen]

Aww Heck

it seems, to me,

your primary problem is that you're emotionally attached and ar emsitaking that attachment for love

yo usee Love is being able to accept them for whom they are, no matter how the world sees them or you or the both of you

yet, in a realtionship to love, you must first Like

i am a christian, so thus i msut love every human being, but no, i dont have to like them, but yes i want to,

as for the girl(s) i'm debating in my mind whom i'd like more: i like and love them, but there are some girls, the one whom namely act ditzy or in-the-moment likethati show christian love to but dont like or emotionally attach to them

to break you emotional attachment requires so much more will than to create the attachments

the wa yo ubreak this 'shackle' is as simple as this: Forgive their criems against you, and forget they made the crime to you, since you're a girl, it may be harder yes, but it's the only effective way

you see both girls i'm in love with atm, i EARNED their favor to make them my friend first, then became emotionally attached
did this boy earn your favor in any 'just-friends' way? if not then yes, he'll break up with you for unacceptable reasons

if, however a boy should basically be 'the girl's servant' then this following method would be the one to look for and is simply the best strategy a guy can use

the boy must try to earn the girl, and the girl should thus acknowledge his efforts, but assess the boy's actions before she accepts him, and she she feel he gave her enough loyalty for her heart, then she may give him her heart

some girls dont like guys doing this - i know that - but hoenstly it's a sign of integreity and devoution to that one person, a sort of ultimate flattery, but without the "creepy" parts held within flattery itself

i flatter a girl by being a gentleman - find what your heart seek in a guy, then when a guy wants to hook up with you - make you're hearts hugest priced deman and see if he rolls with it if not - then let him go

What he says is absolutely right. I am a Christian myself. And yes, these facts are true.

Quote:

Saphire1579
Posted: Thu Apr 24, 2008 6:14 pm

personally, i dont think its possible 2 suddenly decide 2 stop loving some1. once ur in love, ur in love, u just dont suddenly decide 2 hate them just cuz something bad happened. even if u focus on all his bad points and hate him, deep down, way deep down, the feelings u have 4 him will never truly disappear, it'll just be a fake image u placed in front of u to fool urself 2 make u feel better (that is, if its actual love, and u dont just think ur in love). The best thing to do in a situation like this, is to move on. dont focus urself on hating him, cuz then ur still focused on him.

What Saphire says is also true. You can never forget you loved someone. But also You cannot begin to mend wounds if you keep opening them right? You need to get the fact straight. He hurt you. Now it's his turn to hurt. And he Will hurt if he truly loves you. Regret is one of the worst pains in the world, seeing it deals a lot with the subject of "opportunities." He lost his "Opportunity" to share a bonding love with you. That's his loss.
And that only means that there's someone a million times better for you.

And again, to what Heck had said, a man needs to Earn his woman. He needs to work for her. Sacrifice for her. Give his All to her. If this boy that broke your heart didn't do that, and doesn't do it now to try and GET you back, then he doesn't love you. Sorry to say it sweety.
And mere love songs won't do the trick.
If he's still in a relationship and sending you notes of love, and he says "I love you." You go right on and say "Bullsh*t" Cause if he loves you, he wouldn't be with that girl in the first place. He would've sucked it up, been a man, and told that girl he loves someone else, and he should be with you at this very moment.  

[Nariko914]

There really is no way to speed up the slow process of getting over someone - it takes time and you must be patient. Occupy yourself with other things - maybe you could take extra-curricular activities at school, or hang out with friends away from where you know your ex will be.
By the way you described him, he is an extremely immature boy and definitely not someone who you could benefit from in a relationship. He doesn't seem to know what he wants (proven by the fact that he apparently "still loves you," and is yet dating someone else). He may even be doing all of this simply to hurt you. He doesn't seem to care about your feelings or be mature enough to make good decisions about what he wants.
If nothing else (and the following statement should be my catch phrase), you could always talk to a therapist or counselor about how you are feeling. They really do care, and they can even help you to get out there and take part in other activities that will distract you from your pain and eventually help you to heal.
If none of that's possible, you are also welcome to PM me if you ever need to.