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 Posted: Mon Oct 16, 2006 9:00 am
ok, so here's my next problem. just a few days ago, my mom told me i couldn't go over to my boyfriends house anymore. she says that i'm always the one who's going over, and he never comes over. and bcs f that, she wouldn't let me go over anymore. and if she found out i did, she'd take the car away. on top of that, my new curfew os midnight. I'M FREAKING 19 AND I HAVE TO B HOME BY 12?!?!?! that's just not right....so, can anyody help me? what should i do? my bro told me he udnerstood that my mom was being unreasonable, and that he'd take care of it, but my urge to say sumthin to my mom is HUGE!! i dunno if to wait and see what my br manages, or go ahead and say sumthin, which might screw up whatevr plan my bro may have....anybody got any ideas? crying xp
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Posted: Mon Oct 16, 2006 1:19 pm
um, if your 19, and still living under her roof, then you better just do what she says, or else if she wanted, she could just kick you out. thats just my advice, either that, or move the hell out or that house and get your own place. age dont matter when it comes to parents, its as long as you live under the roof they provide over you, you must follow their rules. even if your 50, you'd better still listen to them.
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Posted: Mon Oct 16, 2006 3:16 pm
When my sister was 20 she still had to be home by Midnight.
Anyways, Why not just have him over a few times? Or perhaps move out?
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Posted: Mon Oct 16, 2006 8:00 pm
My advice to you: If you are truly that bothered, wait until you have calmed down enough to speak to your mother. Although if you feel that if you were to confront her about your feelings on this matter only for an arguement to ensue, then perhaps it is better you do not. You are nineteen years old, at the same time, you are still under your mother's roof. So by all technicalities, you are still under her care. So you will have to abide by whatever rules she makes for you until such a time you decide to move out and do so.
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Posted: Tue Oct 17, 2006 8:15 am
while i'll b thinking about the whole moving out thing, i'll add that what bugged me was that b4 she wouldn't do this to me. my curfew b4 was 1, or 1:30, and she was ok with it. but all of a sudden she changed it. THAT'S what bothered me the most. furthermore, the reason my boyfriend doesn't come over that often is bcs he doesn't have a car nor a liscence, and his family isn't all that nice as to drop him off at my place...heck, they won't even take him to college! he has to walk from his house to the bus stop, get to the train that way, and walk to college....that's why he doesn't come over. he doesn't exactly have the means to crying so....anybody got any more ideas? all that has been said is helpful, but the more advice the better xd and to all those who have already said their share of thoughts: THANK YOU!! whee 3nodding
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Posted: Wed Oct 18, 2006 10:22 pm
Well, I've never had such problems personally, because I'm still in high school. But my brother is legally an adult and has luxuries given and revoked for no other reason than he hasn't seemed to be doing much around here lately. He rolls with the punches like a trooper and listens to our parents. I suggest you do the same.
And how old is your boyfriend? I hope you don't mind my saying, but if he's going to college, he really should think about getting his license soon. You're 19 so I'm guessing he's older (Though I may be wrong) and he's waited a long time to get it. All in all, your mother is looking out for your well-being and you should respect her decision, even if it is rather sudden.
And pressure your boyfriend to get that license, that way maybe he'll be allowed to come visit you instead of you visiting him all the time.
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Posted: Thu Oct 19, 2006 9:23 am
ioji that was very well said and i would have said the same its true just listen to what ur mom has to say and respect it i rember this one time i had a date with this guy and its not like my mom hated the person its just that she thought i was to younge to be dating and it was gold out he was going to take me to an amusment park so i was not dressed right i was wearing short sleeves and a mini skirt . my mom was trying to look out for me and told me to put on a sweater and leggings and stuff and i told her no u just want me to look bad for my date and she was like honey i dont care about ruining ur date right now i just want u to be healthy and warm . i was so mad at my mom i only took a light sweater and she was right i should have changed into warmer clothes bc i ended up not having a good time bc i was so cold and i did get sick .
so i guess what i am trying to say is listen to ur parents they r older and wiser and MOST the time (not always) they know what they r doing and it is for ur own good and well being .
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Posted: Thu Oct 19, 2006 3:15 pm
Ahh, the troubles of living at home...I know them well. I'm 21, and still living at home (the cost of living alone is CRAZY eek ) My advice, wait for the issue to calm down a little, and then try to strike a compromise. Parents usually give in, if you wait long enough.
Also, your boyfriend really SHOULD get his license, even if he doesn't have a car. It will just put him one step closer to being independant, and one step closer to being able to come to your house.
Hope it works out for you 3nodding
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Posted: Fri Oct 20, 2006 6:58 am
while i'll admit such answers were not the expected, i'm grateful towards everyone that has posted advice here for me to have a b*tch-slap of reality. i guess even tho it's not what i want, i have no other choice but to accept reality....i know she's lookin out for my well-being, but since it was so sudden and harsh, that's what caught me off guard. i've slightly calmed down, but i think i'll wait a little longer and then bargain with her to see if i can lighten up the situation. Anime Duncan, u couldn't be any futher from the truth, living alone is just too expensive. and i most certainly will wait for the issue to calm down [i was so pissed at my mom i didn't even wanna see or hear her over the phone...i just didn't want to interact with her in any sort of way]. so, yeah...cooling off is definetely what i need... also, since evryone here thinks i should press my boyfriend into getting his liscence [he's only a month older than me, so as to answer the "is he older" question], here's why i haven't done it: when i bring up the issue, even tho he remains calm, i know it bothers him...he's failed the exam 3 times already [the permit one...he hasn't, obviously, taken the actual driving one] and it's really frustrating for him. i never bring it up because of that. last time i did, he really got pissed. i handled it, of course, and we're stil together [ an argument that stupid is not enough to break a relationship that has lasted 1 year and almost 4 months]. so...that's why. if anyone can answer and advice to that other problem above mentioned, it'll b greatly appreciated. and to evryone that has already spoken, once more, THANK YOU VERY MUCH!! whee
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