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 Posted: Sun Oct 23, 2022 9:37 pm
The wind gently whistles through his ears. Dark eyes opened slowly. The bright sunlight was almost too harsh to look at but it warmed his skin. A welcome and comfortable feeling. Tall grass shifted and waved around him as he lay on a hill side that over looked the caravan.
How long had he been asleep?
Sitting up he stretched his arms over his head. Letting out a small grown and yawning. Watching a monarch butterfly flutter by. It was Spring and the caravan had come to this warm place to stay a while. Warm places always made him tired.
For a moment he felt out of sorts. Like he didn’t mesh with his reality. There was someone missing. Someone with red hai. Who’s face he could only remember looked so sad. Was it part of a recent dream. “Hm.” He furrowed his brow trying to remember who they were.
“Dracian!” A familiar voice called out. A young girl came racing up the hill. He unbound dark hair trailing behind her.
“Clementina….” Dracian murmured her name. All of a sudden she was jumping on top of him. Knocking him back down to the ground.
“Dracian! Where have you been? We were all out looking for you!” She smacked him on the nose.
“Ouch Clementina!” He rubbed his nose. “If you are going to hit me please don’t hit me in the face. It’s my best feature.”
The girl’s face wrinkled before she rolled off of him. Laying next to him in the grass she gazed up at the blue sky. Soft, fluffy clouds scutting by. “We’re you sleeping? What did you dream about?” She rolled onto her side and leaned on her elbow.
Folding his hands over his stomach Dracian sighed. “I keep seeing someone’s face and they look….really sad. Heartbroken? And it makes me feel sad to but I don’t know if this is someone I met before or just my subconscious.”
Clementina nibbled at her bottom lip. “Mmm I don’t know. I mean, if they aren’t familiar then it’s probably just someone imagined.” She stated matter of factly.
Dracian was still unsure. He felt certain that the person he saw he knew. And this feeling that he knew this person was strong. A heaviness settled on his chest and he felt a stinging at the corner of his eyes.
“Dracian? Are you ok? You look like you are about to cry.”
The worry in her voice stirred him. He sat up once more then climbed to his feet. Brushing grass and dirt from his pants before offering his hand to the girl. “Come on. It’s almost lunch time and I bet Mama has something tasty cooking.”
She took his hand using it to help pull herself up. “How do you know?”
He grinned, tapping his nose. “I can smell it.” Dracian crouched low. “Come on I’ll give you a lift.”
Clementina hopped onto her brother’s back. Holding on tight as they bounced down the hill and onto the path that lead back to the camp. Dracian’a mind was still on the dream. The longer he thought about it the more and more it began to fade. Part of him didn’t want it to fade.
“Your aweful quiet.” She poked at the back of his head.
“Just thinking.”
“About your red head?” She grinned with a bit of a tease in her voice.
He didn’t reply.
It wasn’t long until they reached the camp and he let her drop to the ground. Watching as she took off towards home. He himself took his time. Stopping to chat with some of the others who inhabited the caravan as well. The caravan was mostly made up of family members but there were the occasional non-family members.
Soon he found himself home. Stepping through the door he could smell the scent of cloves and his mother’s stew. A favorite of his, he took in a deep breath and let out an appreciative sogh. “Mama that smells delicious. I think it’s your best stew yet.”
Tall and curvy, his mother was a natural beauty. Dracian’s father was rather lucky in that aspect. She laughed and lightly slapped him on the shoulder. “You say that every time I make stew, Dracian.”
He took his seat at the table. A bowl and spoon set upon a place setting. “We’ll it’s true…I…” All of a sudden a searing pain felt like it was going to split his head wide open and he fell out of his seat onto the floor. Holding his head he curled into a ball and cried out in pain.
His mother and Clementina rushed to his side. Calling his name and asking what happened. Soon the pain was but a memory and darkness thicker than he had ever known took him.
Dreams.
Dreams of blood. Of killing. Of sex. And the red haired person. He couldn’t see their face clearly but Dracian knew it was a man. A pain in his chest made it feel like a stone was crushing him. What was it about this red haired person that made him feel so…..incomplete.
When his eyes finally opened it was dark outside. He had been moved to his bed. There he laid, staring at the ceiling silently. His chest hurt and he felt tears wellling up in his eyes. He wasn’t sure why but he just felt like crying.
Rolling over onto his side he did just that. Dracian wanted this feeling, this pain to go away. He didn’t understand. But he didn’t want the visions of that red hair to fade. To forget them felt like forgetting a part of himself.
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Posted: Tue Oct 25, 2022 5:03 pm
The passing of time had no effect on lessening his suffering.
Months had gone by and still he would hear the voice calling his name. He still dreamed of the person with the red hair who’s face he couldn’t see. Sometimes he would dream of a wagon and being inside this wagon with the red haired person. Locked in an embrace that made his heart flutter. Their lips pressed together. Laying together in a bed, curled around one another.
But in those dreams he wasn’t himself. He was someone else. Someone he did not recognize at all.
Dracian would lay awake at night, willing himself to not have these dreams but it did no good. It was like part of himself was searching. Crying out for things he could not remember. It was painful at times.
His mother just thought he needed a wife to stop what she called “mopeing”. He was old enough now to take a bride and have his own wagon and family. To give her grandbabies. Also so she could stop worrying about him and focus on match making Clementina.
As much as he disagreed she kept trying to match make him. He went along with it for a time but each girl his mother had thrust his way was sorely disappointing. Definitely not what he was looking for and they were quickly turned down.
Many more months had gone by since his mother had started a crusade to get her son to marry. She was determined and angry that by now Dracian had not choosen a bride. His mother had paraded any number of girls in front of him. Girls with dark features. Girls with lighter features. Tall girls. Short girls. Thin girls. Large girls. She was trying to gauge his likes and dislikes. He never mentioned red hair. She confronted him at the table during breakfast.
“I don’t understand why you did not like Esmeralda. She cooks, she cleans, she has good hips for many babies she was desperate enough to want to marry you! She was a perfect match!.”
He would have snapped the spoon in half if he would have liked a lecture about destroying his morher’s things. “Because I just don’t.”
His mother smacked a hand down on the table. Her rings chiming from the impact. “That is a bullshit answer, Dracian and you know it.”
“FINE. If you must know I’m waiting for someone…specific.” Someone with red hair that haunted his dreams every night and he was unsure why or who they were even now. There had been no clues, none at all.
“And if that person never comes for you?”
He was agitated now by this question. His blood felt as if it might burn right through his veins. Kicking his chair back he stood. “They will come! They said they would always come for me if I needed them!” Grabbing his coat he stormed out of the wagon. Leaving his mother stunned and speechless.
The air outside was cold and crisp, he took a deep breath before pulling a thin cigar out of his coat pocket. It smelt of cloves. A habit he had picked up recently. Once it was lit he took off out of the camp. No specific place in mind.
His mother didn’t understand. She would never understand. This overwhelming feeling every night. The pit in his stomach every time she brought a new girl around to pair him off with. Every fiber of his being screamed. Wait!
Wait for them. They will come for you.
But who was they? The red haired person? As he thought about them his chest grew tight. Of course the red haired person. They said they would. All he had to do was call.
But how could he call if he didn’t know thei name?
He had spent nights in his dreams being embraced by them. Among other things. The dreams had only intensified and it was like he was scratching desperately at a wall in his mind. Why was he like this? Why was he going through all this pain? For something he could not remember. Couldn’t understand.
It hadn’t been like this before had it?
He sighed. A thick cloud of smoke passing through his lips. A mixture of the smoke and his breath. Looking up at the darkening sky, the moon was already out.
Hurry.
It was the only thing that came to mind.
Just hurry.
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Posted: Wed Oct 26, 2022 1:02 pm
A few years later.
Dracian was standing at the end of the aisle. Dressed in his best wedding garb. Eyes watching nervously as the bride walked down the aisle to the music. He wa red this to go well. He wanted it to be a good match. At this point it was the best he could do. As the bride finally reached the end of the aisle he lifted her veil. Taking her hand and giving it to Antonio.
Clementina and Antonio had been friends since they were little kids It was an obvious match that their mother had avoided because his family was quite poor. At least poor by vagabond standards/ Clementina smiled and blushed as she stood there repeating the words, then vows, rings exchanged and everyone erupted into woops and applause as the newly weds walked back down the aisle.
He hoped it was a good match.
Mother and father had been taken by a strange disease a few years ago so it had fallen onto him to match Clementina. He wanted her to marry for love. Not because it would help elevate their position in the caravan.
It there wasn’t love what was there?
Dracian often thought over the years that love was not for him. Every time the dreams would start to fade and the pain of dealing with them over all these years felt like it wa easing he would meet someone. It would come back so intense that it would cause him to end any relationship he was in at the time.
He still would lay away at night. Reliving those dreams until he finally rell asleep and the dreams almost became real. Someone who’s voice was deep and husky whispering his name in his ear and it set his body on fire.
He would wake up grasping for someone not there and once he realized that it would take him hours to get out of bed
A few months later.
Dracian was walking to Clementina and Antonio’s home. They had decided to leave the caravan and set down roots to raise their children. So far they only had one, a newborn, but they had planned on many many more. That was tine. That is what married couples do.
As he was walking along the river that ran past their home the sunlight shined brightly in his eyes. A sudden, new memory, flashed before his eyes. The same, red haired person’s face. He could see it clearer, the look of shock and utter heartbreak shocked him. We’re they looking at him? Why?
The sudden sharp pain in his chest calling his attention. Looking down he watched as a spear pierced his chest. The searing hot white light that came after felt like it would melt his skin off. When it ended Dracian found himself standing there in the middle of the path, dazed and confused.
That was definitely new. He had never seen their face so clearly before. After all these years, why? His heart had skipped a bear and then it broke. Looking at him and then seeing, feeling the spear in his chest and the absolute look of horror before nothing. It was agony getting these little bits and pieces.
It was almost like someone was feeding him flashes just to fick with him for their amusement. But that was stupid. Why would any higher power or other want to mess with him like that?
Shaking his head Dracian hurried off to his sister’s home.
When he arrived he went right into telling her about what happened on his walk over to her home. After a lot of back and forth they now both sat opposite each other in chairs in the living room. A sour look on Dracian’s face while Clementina had a worried look on her face while she nursed her baby.
“Dracian…..I’m worried about you.” She adjusted the baby. “This obsession has gotten out of hand. Now you think some…..higher power is feeding you scraps to drive you crazy?” She sighed heavily. “Why out of all the people would they pi-“
“I don’t know Clementina! All I know is I never saw that vision before and it was so clear.. I thought I could touch his face…..” Dracian glanced to the ground as Antonio walked into the room.
“Hey Dracian how’s it going?”
“He says he had another vision and that he thinks some higher power is messing with him.” His sister interjected.
Antonio’s face was one of pity. “Hey a Dracian how about I walk you home?” He walked over to Dracian and placed a hand on his shoulder confortinglyZ “We focal talk about it….”
Shoving off his hand he quickly stood and brushed past the other man “Don’t do me any favores Antonio.” And with that he quickly left. Night was beginning to set and the moon was already out. Now a small sliver like a cat’s eye. He walked in no particular direction. No destination in mind.
Soon he found himself at what looked like a sitting place to sit and look at the stars. And so he did. He thought about the old dreams and the new one that came to him while he was wake. But he mostly thought about the red haired man who’s face he was finally able to see. Was he really stabbing him with that spear? Again that sense of it being him but it wasn’t actually him set in. He thought about those eyes. Those lips.
He shivered and looked to the sky:
Clementina and Antonio thought he was crazy. Just as mother and father had
But was he?
I love you, too
The voice rang in his ears. As loud as it had been when he first heart it. He wanted to prove them wrong. To prove them all wrong after all these years. But most of all he wanted to see that man. To embrace him and tell him not to be sad. That he looked better when he smiled. To run his fingers through that red hair, finally.
Dracian sighed. Pulling a thin cigar out of his coat pocket. He wasn’t sure how much longer he could wait.
Or if anything would happen at all.
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Posted: Mon Oct 31, 2022 4:20 pm
It had felt like an entire life time had passed.
What Dracian’s life had been like it had certainly changed now. He had become Baro of the Kimpania. The Boss. He made the important decisions for them all. Where they’d travel. Who they would trade with. Who could join. Ceremonies. Blessings. He had learned it all.
And yet…
Still there was the ever present dream that haunted him. The person with red hair that looked so sad. Had they been sad for him? Why?
For the longest time Dracian had felt as if this person was someone important in his life. But he wasn’t sure how. It nagged at him. He could drown it out with his duities. But in the quiet. When he was all alone. He could not.
Even now though he refused any offer of marriage. A man like him should have a strong woman behind him to bare him children was what they would say. He had enjoyed the company of some women and even some met but it was nothing ever permanet. Permanency felt wrong. Like he would be betraying something if he ever did decide to do it.
And he didn’t like that feeling.
It gnawed at him. Clawed at the inside of his head. After all these years he still did not have an answer. Clementina had given up. She wasn’t as pushy as mother was. His kid sister had just finally come to accept that this was how it was going to be unless something changed.
It was night out. Dracian stood near the bonfire in the center of the wagons. Not only had his role in life changed but so had his appearance. His hair was longer and he wore clothing befitting of a Baro. With patterns and embelishments. He stared deep into the fire; a clove cigar hanging from his lips.
The vision is the red haired person playing out before him in the flames. He blinked and it was gone. He hadn’t noticed just how far he had been leaning towards the fire when a hand touched his chest and pushed him back gently. “Antonio?” Finally he had come back to this place. “Oh Antonio how have you been? I haven seek you in a while.”
Antonio gave him a small smile. “We have been well, especially since you became Baro; Dracian. You have been very generous.” He removed his hand from Dracian’a chest. “Though if you had your own family you might spoil them instead of your nieces.”
“Bah.” Dracian made an indignant noise. “Here we go again.”
“Look Dracian I’m just trying to tell you that people talk. And you waiting out for this red haired person to show up is crazy Find a nice woman to settle down with. Someone good with their mouth to make you forget all about this person.”
Dracian grabbed Antonio by the collar. Dark eyes boring into the other man’s as rage made his face flush. “Do not ever presume that you know what is best for your Baro, Antonio.” Letting the man go he shoved him back and turned swiftly down a row of wagons away from the fire. It was like everyday someone had to make a comment on it.
He stopped in the shadow of one of the wagons. Took a long drag of his cigar and let it out slowly as he looked at the stars.
Where are you? Did you forget me?
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