The wind howled, whistling through the empty branches of the trees; the weather had finally begun to pick up, but it seemed as though mother nature was not yet done with her tricks. Any Soquili looking to fly today would have a hell of a trip, as the wind would take them quicker and farther than their wings could handle. Luckily for Epesi, she wasn't destined to fly, so her hooves carried her softly through the forest. Something inside her had woken, desperate to get out and search for the answer, and so there she was, trudging through the forest to look for that spot. He had taken her there, so long ago, and she hadn't been back since. What exactly had driven her there, of that she was unsure...but she knew she wouldn't run into him. He was gone, and she was okay.She had to be, it was only fair. To admit to herself that she wasn't okay was admitting a lifetime wasted. And it wasn't. There were memories so precious that anyone who dared try to take them from her would risk losing a limb. To admit to being unhappy and lost was to admit that those memories were the only thing she had...
...and they could be; it wasn't fair...
It felt odd, reflecting on the past; in her youth, the past wasn't something she tended to dwell on, and so looking back now felt like a betrayal to the mare of many years ago. That mare would have puffed up her chest and said, 'well, you can't really change the past, so why let it bother you?' and kept chugging along. She would have made friends, lost friends, it didn't matter - everything had a reason and she was all the more grand for it. Now? The small mare huffed, now...she was remiss to say, but now things were different. Her life had seemed like nothing but the past. The young mare itching to run around and goof-off and teach others about the world had long since grown old, tired, and a little worn-down. She still loved life and she still helped others as much as she could, with a big, bright smile on her face reflecting a world of happiness, but it was harder than it used to be. Back in the day all she had to do was spring up to the nearest Soquili and start a conversation - wham! Bam! Either a new friend or a Soquili who found her annoying, in which case, she wouldn't have cared, it was all a grand experience in the big ol' thing called life. Now? She had grown hesitant of others, it was true. She hadn't taken to friends as easily as she did in her youth, and enemies? Oh, she was horrified to make them.
Life had changed her, as was expected....doesn't life change everyone? The mare had thought for a moment about her brother, who had fallen in love with a mare who bore his children and then took off, never to be seen again. It had destroyed him, and changed every aspect of what made him unique. When he fell in love for a second time, it had been longer, more successful, better....but he wouldn't have found her if the first one had left. Change for the good, the bad.....it all still changed him. Her mind then shifted to her 'step'-brother, Bliss, of whom she hadn't seen since she was a young mare. She had heard stories throughout the years, but he was once a vibrant, goofy stallion ready to take on the world and fall in love with every mare. Until the one broke his heart. What had ever happened to them? She was sure breaking someone's heart would change them...
And her parents; age had been the adversary there. They weren't able to be as spritly as before, but they were both okay with it. She supposed she could see life the same way her parents did, but neither of them experienced what she did, neither of them ever knew what it was like in her hooves.
Copper eyes fell onto their destination, as the mare came upon the edge of the forest. There a small cliff hung out over the side of the very large hill, overlooking the grasslands beneath. She had been here many years before, and it was exactly the same - minus the seasons, of course. When he had taken her here years and years ago, it had been spring, so everything what beautiful and in bloom. The grass beneath the hill looked wet now, dead and kinda lifeless. It made Epesi chuckle, it was fitting for where her mind was currently taking her.
She met him in a whirlwind romance that ended with kids rather soon into their relationship. He didn't judge her, nor she him, and they were the perfect fit. They were going to teach their kids to love life, nature, and everything that the world had to offer - and they did. They were happy, in love, and young. But...the kids grew, and their love for one another did not. He left, she didn't stop him, and they've never looked back. She didn't blame him, for she was also at fault - it was selfish and unfair of her to hate him for something that they both did.They were probably both better for it, neither of them tied down to the other when there was so much more out there.
But that had been years ago. He was just a memory, their kids, just memories too. She had become a different mare than the mare that fell in love, the mare that bore children, and the mare that let them all leave. She was older, wiser....sadder.
But determined to keep on chugging along. The ghost of her younger self had sneaked it's way into her heart and she smiled. In this spot, on this hill, overlooking this grass. Yes. She was determined to put it all behind her. She can be who she was - who she is - without any input from anyone else - just like her younger self would have done.
"Goodbye," she whispered to the wind, letting the howling carry the whisper far away from where she stood. Goodbye to the painful memories of the past. They didn't matter anymore.