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 Posted: Sat Apr 23, 2011 11:45 am
She always greets me at the door with automatic weapon fire. 
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Posted: Sat Apr 23, 2011 5:49 pm
He doesn't understand my tough love.
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Posted: Sat Apr 23, 2011 6:28 pm
If both mates show tough love, its not love, its hell unleashed.
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Posted: Mon May 02, 2011 7:19 pm
His dream job was to be a marriage counselor.
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Posted: Tue May 03, 2011 2:51 pm
She kept wearing cuter clothes than me, and she didn't have a p***s. ;o(
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Posted: Tue May 03, 2011 6:16 pm
She kept yelling "RAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAPE!!!" whenever we were out in public & I got tired of having to constantly explain to people that she has Turrets Syndrome... mrgreen
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Posted: Fri May 06, 2011 12:42 pm
I must have been really drunk to not have noticed that he lacks a head.
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Posted: Fri May 06, 2011 10:06 pm
she wouldn't fix her rotting foot and it was starting to smell
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Posted: Fri May 06, 2011 11:43 pm
She "conspired" against me with her sailor scout cohorts... mrgreen
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Posted: Sat May 07, 2011 1:04 am
He beat me to death with a golf club.
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Posted: Sat May 07, 2011 12:38 pm
Their support of crazy capitalist would probably make me want to beat him with a golf club if I hadn't
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Posted: Sat May 07, 2011 12:47 pm
He took Britney Spears' song "Circus" too literally.
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Posted: Sat May 07, 2011 2:43 pm
They turned me into a cat.
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Posted: Sat May 07, 2011 6:09 pm
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Posted: Sun May 08, 2011 12:39 am
I thought I was marrying the girl in their signature, but instead I got the avi... sweatdrop
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