Welcome to Gaia! ::

Well I just bottle it up and if your anything like me and are unmotivated to do anything u get extremely angry but dont see the point in letting it out or doing something. I'm basically just too lazy blaugh mpt necessarily a good thing but yeah... not everyone hurts themselves XD

...I've never cut myself and never intend to, although I do have 2 friends who have before. To get out my stress I normally listen to music, draw, pray, and write stories. Remember even if what I do doesn't work for you, there's always more than one way out of a problem.

I've tried using writing as an outlet, but it never really seems to work. Because I want to hurt myself. I feel like it's what I deserve if I must live the life I've been given. I feel like I should hurt myself to somehow make up for everything that goes wrong. sweatdrop

Thats bad ..dont let it become an addiction. I do it.. from pressure and stress ofcourse... when listening to music it calms you down soft music... it does to me.

I used to cut myself <_< at first it was just because it was the "in thing." Never cut deep enough for scars or anything. I quit though because I thought it was rather stupid thing to do -.o couple years later I cut myself again this time for emotional release. I hold things in, I never used to tell people how I felt, and I never cried. Well, anyways I ended up carving the word PERFECT into my right ankle, not for attention, I wasn't really thinking while I was doing it, I was just releasing my feelings letting all the bad thoughts and feelings out O_o Couple days later I wrote FAULT underneath. That was a full year ago and I still have visible scars. I don't mind them though, I like the reminder, I know people care about me and I don't have to bring it out on myself. <3

I don't self inflict pain on myself anymore I talk to people, people who love me. And I think talking to people and bawling my eyes out is way better than hurting oneself.

And to everyone who inflicts pain on themselves just think that there are other ways to let anger and sadness, and other mixes of emotions out.

Sorry if I didn't make much sense ^^;

Ok I'm now fading of post ninja

Its hard to be strong when nothing is right and everythings wrong

Anger involving my mother, the struggle of my sexuality and no one seems to accept it at home. . .

Just anything I can get a hold of, needles, my fingernails, eraserburns... I'll just go out of control.

I know it's an addiction. But no matter how many times I stop, I always start again. Always. It never ends, but I don't know what to do.

I first started about three years ago--I can't remember WHY, but I know I had stopped shortly after I started. ((Maybe two months? No, I didn't get caught.))

Due to recent events, i've started again. >.>;

It's not always because of bad things happening in my life; sometimes it's just boredom. Boredom isn't the case anymore, though.

For the hell of it, i'll give my (main) reasons.

- I hate myself. I hate lots of people, really. Whenever I say "But I hate people", the common response is "But you don't hate yourself".

I hate myself more than I hate anyone else alive. For what I did, I deserve worse than gashes on my arms and legs.

- I'm miserable, again.

I had gotten over my depressive state, for a time. Of course..that was when pills were being shoved down my throat. An artificial happiness, if you will. I'd rather be miserable than live falsely.

Why am I miserable, now?

Everything that could go wrong went wrong.

For once, I won't elaborate--it's too private a matter to discuss openly.

Bah.


And finally...

- Simply because I can.