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please i do not wish for people to critize my thinking or i wouldnt have posted this here but, i need help...

truth is im really horrible with stress, i bottle it put up with crap from my sister(and i mean crap she beats on me, has thrown sharp objects at me, chased me around the house with a meat cleaver, and threatened to kill me in my sleep), i put up with crap from my parents, and from people at school, my life has basically become a void of deppression, and i keep slipping back into it every time i think im climbing out, a while ago i started doing the thing i probably should never have done, but it seemed to be my only escape, i started cutting myself, and truth is it calmed me, to be able to get my anger and frustration out without hurting others, a couple of friends found out and told me to stop, but they dont understand i cant!, i swear if i end up becoming a murderer, i wouldnt be at all surprised. blood seems to calm me, and as sick and twisted as it may sound i enjoy cutting my own wrists and watching the blood roll down my arm, im a peaceful person who happens to be filled with violent rage, i also enjoy enflicting pain, and i personally scare myself. the problem is my parents dont even know what im dealing with they think im this perfect little angel, my older sister they messed up with and now she thinks she's the queen of the world, so now they are trying to make me their perfect daughter, they messed up with my sister, so im their second run through there chance to be the perfect parents, and i cant take it!! its driving me insane and i seriously scare myself, i just dont know what to do, im so messed up, >_< and its slowly killing me...

please anyone help??

I think if it was possible to talk to them, she wouldve. It harder said than done. I know, cause i cant talk to my parents about anything. But yes it might help to talk to them about it.

Now about cutting. Cutting gives you an illusion that it helps. But logically, how does causing more pain with yourself help? It's a phsycological thing. The human mind is very powerful, i often say.
Anyway not the point. You really should avoid hurting yourself. To release all that pain and anger, talk to someone you can trust. Or find something you like to do? Maybe play video games or write. It helps me sometimes. Just something to keep your mind off the pain.
Crying can help too sometimes, better than bottling it up. Taking a walk with a friend or by yourself at the park. It very soothing. And well hope for the best. You'll get out of the house someday and then you wont have to deal with it no more. Something to look forward to ne?

Good luck with everything. And please take care of yourself.