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 Posted: Wed Oct 10, 2018 6:26 am
 No one had really seen fit to tell him their views on some of his changes - beyond the upheaval and the discontent caused by one of their own being punished for their transgressions, no one had really seen fit to speak to him directly about anything else. On the one paw he had considered this fortunate, that the pride were open to the changes, but the realist in him was quick to remind him that sometimes there were those who simply didn't let their views be known.
Whether it be because they didn't think they would be listened to or if they were simply indifferent was irrelevant, the fact that the majority hadn't said anything to him didn't mean that they lacked an opinion. Realistically speaking he was certain that there would be those in favour of reform, but there would be others who clung to the traditions and new rules set out by the now dead Amoosu.
He needed to find those lions and he needed to find out why they hid behind the views of another that would simply lead them to ruin.
...If he didn't do that then he could never fix it or even begin to address it. He knew where those things led and it was never good, the pride was too fragile to splinter along controversial lines.
Itiri had never been one to completely flaunt who he was and given his more modest approach it seemed that the pride didn't always see him. Short of making himself known, he was able to slip passed many unnoticed and this had proven useful up until this point. He'd heard conversations, taken their views on board and yet... He wished they'd said some of those things to him.
He'd need to work on being more approachable from this point out, he'd been too close to his brother and in his own little bubble... this had been both a boon in certain circumstances and a bit of a curse in others. He was now beginning to appreciate the 'curse' side of it in the sense that no one seemed to be prepared to come to him with their concerns.
Rather than simply think about his actions though, he elected to grab the bull by the horns and do what he aimed to. If his pride wouldn't come to him then he would attempt to come to them and it would start with those he had noticed were becoming a bit more withdrawn and less sociable. They might have other reasons for their change in demeanour, but he'd start off with those leads and then work his way around. Eventually he'd find someone through the process of elimination and in doing so he might also be able to address other issues too.
Two birds, one stone, etc.
This was why he found himself in this particular part of the pride, seeking out yet another pride member who had chosen to keep their distance from their new blood. They might choose to avoid the subject entirely but it was worth a shot at the very least, the worst that could happen was that they had no desire to speak and that was entirely their prerogative!
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Posted: Wed Oct 10, 2018 7:16 am
 Once, Nyarai was one of the Pride’s most vocal members. Her extroverted nature often solidified her position as the centre of attention and she held no reservations in basking in it. She was a caring lioness, a loving lioness; a creature who would dote on her family and friends without hesitation. A creature that would make a fool of herself if it would bring a smile to someone's face. Maybe not everyone would consider her a friend - but surely everyone knew the sound of her laugh, her voice that was usually ringing out loudly; filled with unrestrained optimism and happiness. A voice that had been uncharacteristically silent as of late. A ray of light that was hidden behind a cloud that had been ever present since their borders opened.
The cream lioness had been spending more and more time around the den she shared with her brother, Khwezi. Up until recently, her bloodline carried one of the brightest pelts in a pride of neutrals, never did she expect she would see a day when she could hide from anybody - No doubt the newer, more exotic aesthetics of the outsiders were helping with her camouflage?
There had been a new face amongst the family as of late, Hrayne; an outsider. Nyarai had not been unkind to her. Neither had she gone out of her way to develop a friendship; they coexisted and were civil - and right now that was the best she could offer. Luckily Kwizi was picking up where his sister was lacking - as he always did. Nyarai wandered further away from her home today than she had as of late, mainly because she did not want to be left alone with their new lodger.
Itri was so often a shadow; but even shadows became clear when light shone down so brightly from the heavens. Citrus eyes locked on his dark frame for a second and then darted away; for a breath she wondered if she would pretend she had not seen him darkening her peripheral vision? Alas, if she had seen him, he had no doubt seen her.
A new wave of awkwardness overcome her; the last time she had seen Itri was the night of the rock slide, when he had first taken his mantle. They had echoed a lot of the same opinions that night in regards to the punishment that befell the youngling; that though he was blind, he still had a place amongst them, he was still cared for - he was loved as one of them. If he had been there she would have wanted to hold him close; for she resented not his punishment, but the thought that he might think they held any ill will towards him. The price had been paid.
Still, despite her support, she had not actually talked to Itri that night - not congratulated him. When the rocks fell panic had settled into her bones, her brother was not with her that night and his safety took priority over politeness. Who would have thought the very next day she would find a body? Itri did not know that though, did not know her beyond gossip and reputation. She must have looked - very foolish, rude even.
“Onyeisi, good morning.” She smiled the best she could, but despite her effort, it still appeared hollow and all too tired.
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Posted: Wed Oct 10, 2018 7:29 am
He knew of her but he had never really been the life of the party. He'd been drilled to recognise families but in the grand scheme of things it had been his own fault that he didn't know any of them with the level of intimacy he would have preferred. Contrary to what some might think, despite his machinations at this precise moment in time, he genuinely cared for those in the N'ezi and would never think of harming them.
...Alas, it seemed that he had failed in some form or another.
He was grateful that Nyarai chose to speak to him in those moments; despite what reservations she might have and what appeared to be some weariness, she had elected to see him rather than to let him slip by unnoticed. Granted, he had already sworn that he would strike up the conversations himself for the foreseeable future so he could get the views of the families. Regardless of whether their opinions were in favour or against his decisions he needed to hear them.
"Good morning," he offered a smile of his own and gave a very slight bow of his head. "Are you well?" He could have gone on observations alone but that would have been uncouth. On this occasion it was better for him to allow her to say what she preferred, after that he would ask more candid questions...or rather he would if he found the opportunity to do so.
At the very least he was a touch grateful that he had caught sight of her, she had formerly been one of the lives of the party and yet she had become much more quiet in the months that followed. Something was clearly amiss but for all he knew it could have been another love affair that had become a muddled mess; goodness only knew that they had enough of those! Suffice it to say that the lion was no matchmaker but he'd probably give it a go if this became a legitimate problem, alternatively he might plead to one of those who had more expertise in that area.
...When it came to that subject he was a bit of an idiot and he wasn't afraid to admit it.
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Posted: Wed Oct 10, 2018 8:05 am
Heck. Was she meant to bow?
The females brow furrowed at the thought; as it was one that had never resonated before. This was her home, the familiar faces her family; Itri and herself were not that different in age - she remembered a time when they were both young. She had seen him then, as clearly as she did in this moment. ”I am okay, thank-you. Yourself?” Her words were instinct; a conversation she had partaken in countless times; so easy to recite, she spoke without thinking.
It was the proper thing to say when someone was trying to make small talk? Itri was an acquaintance, one of the many members of the pride that for one reason or another - had remained distant from her. The cream female simply had no reason to believe his question was trying to invoke a response that held more weight; in fact, burdening him with her sombre thoughts seemed unfair. He had his own challenges to contend with - all of greater importance than her own melancholy.
She turned to face him properly then, her head tilting curiously in such a way that made her long fringe cascade across a masked face. ”Khwezi, he is on patrol.” Her words were careful and considered, even as they left her maw they were laced with hesitation. It would make more sense if Itri was searching for her brother - there had been more and more rogue interaction on the border, maybe the chieftain had questions regarding them? Nyarai would not be offended if that was the case - the two of them were close, even as adults; many approached her to locate him.
Vibrant eyes drifted away from him shyly; an action that was out of place for a creature so bold. Words had been harder to summon as of late and she was lost for them once more. An impostor she must have been for her confidence to be so easily broken. A smile did reach her face then, reflected in her eyes; even if the thought was self deprecating - it was a funny one at the very least. Nyarai was not a creature that many would describe as beautiful, especially given her clumsiness - but at times like these she could look soft, at the very least.
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Posted: Wed Oct 10, 2018 8:28 am
"I imagine he would be," Itiri had left the majority of the pride's guards to their own devices. They'd done well up until this point and he had no reason to intervene, quite frankly he had no intention of doing so unless it came to light that some were being provocative or deliberately hostile! He appreciated the need for caution, but to be truly provocative might invite disaster upon a pride that didn't have the numbers to protect itself.
"His paws are probably full," he added, conceding that every now and then a number of curious wanderers found themselves greeted by the caldera's walls. With only one way in (for most individuals) and one way out, it was difficult to be missed and those out of place were quickly spotted.
Nevertheless she had asked him a question, a conversational one that no doubt came in response to his own. It was clear that on this occasion she prefered the less intimate form of communication, an exchange between passing acquaintances. He'd give her the respect she deserved, if she didn't want to discuss her weariness then he wouldn't press - she had her family for that and perhaps a number of close friends to confide in.
"I am well," he said after a moment and cleared his throat. "Information gathering for want of a better explanation," he added. He'd let that settle for a moment, but it was clear he wasn't done speaking. No sooner had he given her several moments to digest it than he had started to speak once more.
"You wouldn't have a moment or two to spare for me, would you?" he hazarded. She could be busy and if that was the case then his search would have to continue, but he would try to keep it short at the very least. If she preferred to keep her views top-line then he would accept that and leave her be, if she had other concerns though, he'd listen to those as well.
"Just a moment," he reassured her. "Not several hours," he finished.
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Posted: Wed Oct 10, 2018 8:54 am
”Oh.” Blood rushed to her face; her pale pelt betraying her embarrassment. It seemed like a redundant statement really; one that made so much sense in the moment - but of course Itri knew where her brother was. She cleared her throat and looked towards her paws; trying to hide her shame. Lately she had felt like little more than an overgrown cub, naive to this new world. ”Yes. They are.” Her voice was gentle; at least she told herself he was busy - and not just avoiding her or their home. The trail of thought was cut off by the dark males next words-
Information gathering? Her gaze was back to him; what could he possibly be surveying? Even though she was curious; one silly statement was enough for today - she would prefer to wait until he made his motives known before she spoke out, instead of speculating and appearing more foolish than she already had.
She could not shake the feeling that she was in trouble? Had her absence been noticed? Nyarai was a huntress; now there were more mouths to feed than ever - maybe their chieftain thought she was slacking? Maybe her lack of engagement at the feast had offended? The thought sent a chill down her spine. She had never been in trouble; not even when she was young! Rowdy, yes. A trouble maker? Never.
Nyarai had always both respected and feared authority figures in equal measure. Now she supposed Itri was THE authority. ”Of course, all the time you need.” She tried to reassure him; nearly tripping over her words as she spoke.
The cream female sat, wrapping her tail around her legs as she made herself as comfortable as she could given the circumstances. She was not sure what information she could offer him; but she would try - if he thought she could be useful.
To be honest the feeling warmed her; that someone might think she could still be of use.
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Posted: Wed Oct 10, 2018 9:06 am
Itiri blinked in surprise. She was being surprisingly accomodating and it felt a touch abrupt to him. Was this another consequence of his isolationist behaviour as of late or was there something else? He was a bit of a walking paradox at the moment; on the one paw he had adjusted well to the role he was in now and he was enacting changes that he deemed necessary... On the other he didn't really know how to act around those in his home now, not with the added mantle of authority anyway.
He had wanted to strike a fine balance between that authority and friendship, but so far he wasn't confident he could achieve that. He wasn't normally socially awkward, in comparison to his brother he was quite the politician, but on this subject he was still learning.
"Ah..." Itiri cleared his throat as he gathered his thoughts and then sat down himself. He'd keep his distance, if only to ensure she was comfortable, but it wasn't long before he had lifted both front paws in a gesture similar to open arms.
He wasn't asking for a hug, it was more of a self depracating act.
"Well, it will come as a surprise to no one that I have made several changes in the last few months," he began and took a small breath. "But absolutely no one has actually told me what they think of them," he admitted.
There was a pause.
"I wish they would," he added and cleared his throat. "I have overheard...things," he shook his head. "But there are few who have actually said anything in favour or against it, not really..." he pressed both his paw 'palms' together and pursed his lips.
"So rather than walk about in the shadows and overhear conversations like a creep, I thought it better to simply ask," he tilted his head to the side and nodded. "So... Might I ask for your views?"
"You may be as succinct or in depth as you like," he reassured her. "Or you can refuse entirely, I will respect it regardless."
Ah, but it seemed that the young leader had no intention of being intimidating and favoured a much more relaxed approach. He had no need of pomp and circumstance and perhaps that message would eventually reach the rest of the pride. At the very least he hoped his more casual approach would bring some small comfort, he hadn't set out to be intimidating...he'd just come seeking information.
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Posted: Wed Oct 10, 2018 9:42 am
“I…” Her maw opened as if she was going to speak - but choked on the words. She gazed upon him with accusation; was this a trick question? For a breath her mind fought with itself, wondering why he would care for her opinion? She was so used to having eyes roll in her direction, so used to being treat like a clown - a child; that the serenity of his request stole the air from her lungs. She blushed again, this time for an entirely different reason.
“I am not educated enough to have any views, not really - I do not envy the burden of choice that you carry.”
If he was asking her if he had made the right decision - well, to be honest, the prospect of having to make any decision was near terrifying. Nyarai did not question the way of the world, that was not her place - it was his. She cleared her throat, mulling over her words a little longer. The cream female could not say one way or another if he had made the right choice; but the fact he had MADE one was enough to earn her respect.
“I think you are really brave.”
All she could offer him was her willingness to try and live the life he had envisioned for them. She would stand by him unconditionally, until a day came when his choices were proven to be harmful. “I wish I could be as brave.” It was her turn to pause then, though she did not say the words - she might as well have done.
She looked towards the ground again like it might hold some answers to why she sometimes found it hard to breathe; or why she often felt nauseous. Why she was so tired all the time? Or why her muscles ached like she was twice her age. Though the plague had not returned - there was a sickness that had clung to her bones and dampened her spirits. Unfortunately, this one seemed just as impossible to cure.
Even though the female went silent; words were clearly still hanging off her tongue.
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Posted: Wed Oct 10, 2018 11:58 am
His brow rose and his lips had cupped into a little 'o' as he regarded her. She hadn't given the answer he'd expected, quite frankly it was a non answer in his books and it almost seemed like she was under the assumption he needed reassurance from her. While reassurance would be appreciated that wasn't why he was here, he wanted honesty, he wanted them to be candid, hell he wanted them to shout if that was how they really felt.
"Right," He said after a moment, slowly at first. "Well, all right I have a few things I would like to say in response," he paused and then shook his head. "The first being that every individual in this pride is entitled to a view and an opinion, even if they don't agree with me or any other individual they meet," he pointed out.
...That was a key point, they may not live in a democracy but they could at least make their presence felt in some form or another!
"The second is that anyone can be 'brave', if you are judging courage on the ability to make a choice," he shook his head. While he had certainly made a choice and it might have taken some guts, he had regarded it as a necessity rather than an act of courage. It was either the pride's demise or it's survival, in the grand scheme of things there was no contest.
"So level with me," he fixed his gaze on her and drew his lips into a thin line. "You can either answer my question properly rather than placating me with some form of compliment," he had elected to call her out on the pleasantries. Some might have liked them but that genuinely wasn't what he was there for. "Or we can pretend this conversation never happened and I can allow you to continue with your day," he cleared his throat.
"The choice is yours."
The ball was in her court, even if he was using her own compliments against her to a degree (for benign reasons of course)!
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Posted: Wed Oct 10, 2018 1:49 pm
The cream lioness audibly laughed, her gaze drifting to the skies as if she was praying for guidance. “I miss Isiike.” She finally mused, remembering what his body looked like amongst the rocks. Nyarai would always remember that moment - when her illusion of peace was shattered. “Or at least I thought I did. Until I realised what I really missed was feeling safe.” A chuckle rumbled in her throat as her gaze settled on him once more; she was afraid of the words she was about to speak.
Saying them out loud was admitting her cowardice. Did he want the little pride she had left?
“Before the rogues came, I knew every face in this pride. I never knew a stranger… and its very unsettling to see a face whose blood I do not know, whose upbringing is a mystery or whose name is unfamiliar on my tongue.” It was so hard to explain, but in the same breath she was sure many knew the feeling. The feeling that something was out of place; that though their home was still familiar - it had changed. “The children will have an easier time adjusting. Me? I don’t know how to start a relationship from the beginning. I have never had to.” Her brow furrowed, wondering if she was making any sense at all?
“More so. I spent a very long time blaming outsiders for the tragedy that befell us; in the same breath I thought that keeping to our traditions would keep the few of us that remained safe. If I was honourable and respected our culture and laws, then death would not take my brother like it took our parents.” At least when she believed that she felt like she had some power. If there was nobody to blame for the tragedy, if there was no sense of punishment or reason behind it - she would truly keep nobody safe. “If that was not the case then I have a lot of misplaced hatred to make up for - and I dare not look them in the eye for guilt.” A fear like that though - how was she meant to let go of it so quickly?
She thought of Neche then. Her little friend - now a man grown. Now with more responsibility that she had ever dreamed of. “I went to him and asked him to judge me like the outsiders, to know if I was worthy of being here.” Tears threatened her eyes then and she had to choke back the lump in her throat. Her views were not as political as they were reflective, there was many demons she needed to lay to rest. After taking a moment to compose herself (he would not see her cry) she continued.
“And I still do not know if I am - because I don’t feel safety nor stability. This was my home first, these lions were my family - and I hate feeling as anxious as I do. I hate feeling like a stranger in lands that used to offer me such comfort. I hate that I am questioning everything I knew - questioning who I am.” If he wanted the truth - she would give him that. She took a deep breath, her chest rising before falling in a sigh.
”If the fact that feeling uncomfortable that there are strangers in my home, in my den, who are questioning my beliefs; makes me weak or cruel.”
The lioness stood then. She did not know why she was telling him this - her internal struggles meant very little; even if they were struggles that many inside the pride faced. “It is like the water has turned red and the sun has turned blue.
I don’t know what to think anymore.”
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Posted: Thu Oct 11, 2018 3:18 am
It was in those moments that Nyarai demonstrated the courage that she had previously indicated she didn't have. She'd expressed herself properly, conveyed how she felt, and more importantly she had laid all of her cards in the table. Her reaction to his decisions had been the ones he had most been expecting, he had turned the pride on its head and while it had been necessary, for those who hadn't known anything else and weren't ready to know anything else, it had come as a shock.
"It is not within Nche's capacity to know who you are, only that you have the capacity for good or harm," he pointed out gently. He had grasped the concept of what the seer could do and while he saw great value in the ability to sense an individual's intentions, it was asking too much of him to determine purpose or a sense of self.
"It would also be unfair for him to point you in a direction, when you should really be walking the path you prefer," he added softly. Isiike had already led them down a specific path, slammed shut their doors and shunned the outside world. Only when they had fallen into isolationism had he retreated back to his catacombs and forgotten that the living existed. Itiri couldn't blame Isiike for all of this of course, it had been his father who had conceded to the Death Priest's influence... But those series of events had done more damage than Itiri cared to see.
...What was 'normal' to his home was unhealthy and in the end it would have been destined to kill them prematurely.
"It is also perfectly acceptable to place blame on something you cannot see and have never met, especially when that is all we have ever been taught," he pointed out. He remembered the plagues, they'd taken a fair number of his own family, and yet something had been amiss. It was a coincidence that an outsider had caused this illness, but who was to say that eventually it wouldn't have arrived anyway?
Disease could travel by several means, they knew that better than anyone...it was just easier to blame the easier target. It was normal too, particularly in the grief stricken who wanted something to hold on to.
"Death comes to us regardless of what we do and to fear the possible, though it may be improbable, is..." He paused.
Actually, maybe he should approach it from a different angle.
"I made the decisions I did for the exact reasons you now feel uncomfortable and anxious," he said finally and shook his head. It was better for him to start from the beginning, to help her understand his motivations and then in time, perhaps she would find the confidence in herself again. "You never knew a stranger, you never knew anything beyond our home, and if that was to go on for another few generations...we would be extinguished."
"Death is unavoidable, we all move towards it each day, it is life that is fleeting and as we stood...we were not alive, we simply existed," he pointed out softly. "In time we would have stumble over our own blood lines, so deeply intertwined that happiness would then be forbidden. Love would be cast aside because we simply could not encourage a union as an example," he tilted his head to the side and released a sigh.
"I knew that there would be controversy and suspicion, that there would fear and resentment," he pursed his lips. "But in order for us to live we needed to step out of the shadows."
"Death and life come paw in paw, if we do not embrace that gift then we cannot do our ancestors justice. If we allowed ourselves to stagnate as Isiike desired then there would be no one left to honour them in the future. We as a pride would cease to exist..."
This had always been his greatest concern and why he would have been destined to clash with Isiike in the coming months. Whether the Death Priests liked it or not, Itiri was the Onyeisi and it was his duty to secure the happiness and well being of the living.
...They could snort the dust around the bones of their ancestors as much as they wanted, but their obsession with the bleached bones would not harm those who still lived and breathed.
"I cannot let that happen," He said finally and sighed.
"But..." he hazarded a wry smile as he regarded the lioness. "All friendships, temporary or long lived, begin with a conversation," he pointed out gently. "Just as you speak to me now, the same principle applies," he continued. "I do not expect you to hold a conversation now with the newer additions to our family lines but perhaps in the future you might consider it."
"Remorse and guilt are normal, I have already attempted to give clarity around this to those who are new. With context, the apprehension becomes more understandable and it will take patience for those such as yourself to come out of their shells."
"Now if they are questioning our beliefs as a pride, then that is another matter entirely and you are more than welcome to send them to me. I will give them the feedback they are entitled to - they came to us for a reason, if they do not wish to embrace our culture then they will leave it," he pointed out. Suffice it to say that Itiri might have been diplomatic, but there was something else underneath the surface that hinted that he wasn't above making a stand.
He had accepted new blood because it wanted to join, if they would not conform to the beliefs of the N'ezi-Ozu, then he had absolutely no problem with stripping them of that welcome and removing them. They were welcome here so long as they genuinely wished to be a part of what the N'ezi were... That would soon change if he found they were dishonest.
"All I can ask for is your patience, while all I can give is my reassurance that they will not cause harm. While there is always a possibility, it remains improbable... If we fear every little change then we will begin to suspect our own shadows. This is the only way to bring us back to prosperity even if it is one of the most difficult things that could be asked of a pride."
"Even I know I am asking for far more trust and faith than my father before me, but I am certain that this is the right path, it is the only one that I saw during my trials."
The lion wasn't lying either, both on his wanderings in the forbidden regions and within his meditative state, he had seem the exact same thing. There was no other path for them, but even then, it had been riddled with obstacles in his dreams as well and it was likely that it would continue to be if others shared her sentiments...
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Posted: Thu Oct 11, 2018 6:12 am
He was speaking sound logic; so eloquent she would have been in awe in any other situation. She found it hard to admire him when he was holding a mirror to her face, making her face her own demons. The cream lioness was deep in self reflection and the vacant look in her eyes suggested she was arguing internally, back and forth. She remained quiet for a few good moments as she digested his words, then very suddenly her eyes regained their sparkle.
“I want to become a Di-anyi.” The words might have sounded oddly out of place but there was logic to be found. It was a path she had been contemplating for some time now and though it might have seemed odd to combat change with more change - this choice she held power over. It was also the only feasible way she could help if disease were to strike once more. She would not feel as powerless - even if her efforts proved futile. “I was already going to ask someone to take me as an apprentice; when I felt up to it.” She did not know how much longer she was going to mope in her den; but she was not quite done with that yet.
Healing was a process that could not rush; even if she wanted to.
Her eyes lowered once more, her ears flattening against her skull. “I was happy.” She mused. Maybe to Itri it seemed like they were just merely existing - but Nyarai had never seen the life she had as mere existence. She had her brother, her best friend, a family that had communally raised her after her parents departed. She had even began to fall in love - life was good. Now her brother was busier than ever, Afya was still adjusting to motherhood and Ink…
Well, maybe that was just not meant to be; especially if this change was to encourage new blood into the families. It was a sombre realisation; but maybe she had to stop equating her happiness to her loved ones. Maybe becoming Di-anyi would help her find that peace once more.
“I do not doubt we were heading to ruin, and that maybe the changes you have made have saved our future. But no change comes without sacrifice or an end to something that was here before.” It did not sit well with her that once more it was her generation that had to deal with the loss. Many had already lost their family to disease; now the comfort and stability that many used to help overcome that loss was being compromised. “The Pride is bigger than it has been in most of my memory - and I feel lonelier than I have ever felt. After we lost so much already - it just seems unfair. I used to think life was kinder than that, that the hard times were behind us.”
It was foolish; she knew it was foolish - but her trust that the fates would ‘never challenge a person more than they were able to endure’ was what had given her hope for so long. Knowing that life had no care for her limitations or wants; that was disheartening to say the least. Still, if she must. “If there are any healers amongst them, I will listen to what they know. When it is appropriate..” She would have a lot to learn and did not want to get ahead of herself. More so it gave her an excuse for not jumping into ‘conversation’ right away.
Though her issues were far from resolved; at the very least she felt like a weight had been lifted from her shoulders. Just saying it out loud helped; knowing that Itiri understood and did not judge her feelings. “You don’t need to ask for my trust, you earned that since before your mane grew in. So, never doubt my faith in you, Onyeisi. Or I may take offence.” Her last words were clearly made in jest as she offered him the first, genuine, smile of their meeting.
Nyarai loved this pride, and when she spoke of her family it extended to him. It was an unconditional loyalty that built the foundations of her character. Whatever Itiri decided she would stand by because he now controlled the thing she held most dear; the N’ezi itself.
“I guess this is my chance to say congratulations, the festivities were cut short, I never got the opportunity.”
“I hope you don’t take issue at me saying so, but the past few times we have talked; it's been rather exhausting. I hope there is more light hearted conversation to be had in the future. I almost miss talking about the weather.”
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Posted: Thu Oct 11, 2018 7:07 am
She had been happy, and her points remained valid as she made her case known. To his generation they had settled in to some form of normality and to those who didn't look at the wider picture life really had been good. He had set that way of life alight and in the process he had damaged the picture of tranquility they had made for themselves... she had every right to feel as she did, though strangely, he felt no remorse.
Perhaps it was the fact that he had done what he deemed necessary, he had already come to terms with the fact that there would be damage. There would be anxiety, suspicion and upset. There would be apprehension, paranoia and even some hostility, but in the end it would be his job to navigate those turbulent waters and bring them out the other side.
...Hopefully.
He'd give her the respect she deserved in this one and he certainly wouldn't chastise her for her sense of isolation and loneliness. She would have the opportunity, in her own time, to correct that in some form or another. It wasn't his place to push any harder than necessary and on this occasion all he could do was reassure her that she was free to feel as she did... But if she could keep an open mind he would appreciate it.
"While I cannot say that I know what made you happy beyond the sense of security that you now lack, there is nothing to prevent you from pursuing the connections you had before and embracing them," he shook his head. If she wanted to remain within her own family and connections for now, only getting to know those who joined her specific house, then he would permit it. Eventually she might learn the names of some others in separate houses but for now, finding solace in what she already had was perfectly acceptable.
"I am confident there will be several individuals who may be able to help broaden your horizons beyond what our Di-anyi may know. If you want to become a Di-anyi though, then I would encourage you to grab the opportunity by both paws when you are ready," he nodded. Suffice to say that the Di-anyi were one of his more favoured ranks given that like him, they had a preference for ensuring that the pride was happy and healthy.
...Not that he didn't appreciate the Hunters and Guards, but the Di-anyi served a very important role in his vision for what the pride could be.
"I dare not say that life is always kind, but your actions can make it a little kinder," he added after a few moments of consideration. "A touch philosophical perhaps, but something I would be inclined to live by." He admitted softly.
"Nevertheless," he chuckled at her attempts to jest and shook his head. "I will take your word that you have trust in me, on the condition that you speak freely in the future," he lifted a paw to wag a single toe. "I am not here to judge, in the grand scheme of things Death does that for me," he pointed out.
"I am here to help, or at least I will try."
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Posted: Sat Oct 20, 2018 12:52 pm
“No. Perhaps you’re right.” There was nothing preventing her from seeking comfort in those she had once been close to. In the same breath - she could not help but worry. How would they treat her now she had lost her smile? Would they still find comfort in her company when her warmth had faded? Or had this experience changed them too - would she still recognise their hearts if she reached for them? The cream female shook her head and laughed softly. Things were never going to be the same ever again - but she supposed the Onyeisi never intended them to be.
Either way - Itiri seemed to have too much faith in her. Nyarai’s love had always been unconditional - from a young age she knew her greatest asset was her gentle heart, her kindness and the laughter she could inspire. She had never been afraid of giving away her light to whoever needed it, even if it was at her own detriment- and look where it had gotten her. Her kindness, her actions - had done very little in the grand scheme of things. ”It’s a plan I will put in motion very soon. But first - there are some words that have gone unsaid for far too long..”
She had been neglecting her roles - as the auntie to her best friends cubs - to the boy who stole her heart - as a sister.
She smiled at him then - sighing in defeat. His logic was exhausting, his words resonating in her - despite her best attempts to remain in a sulk. She had never felt so much like a moody adolescent, maybe she was finally growing up? “You know, not too long ago everyone was trying to get me to shut up. They would call you a fool for wishing such a torment on yourself.” She did have a reputation for being a chatterbox and a tad annoying depending on who you asked.
Yes. Death would judge them all eventually, even he. Maybe to outsiders the thought would be morbid; but most N’ezi did not fear death. Neither did Nyarai - admittedly it was loneliness she feared beyond all else. Being the one left behind - that was the thought that kept her awake at night. The reason why her heart felt so heavy right now. ”Thank you.” She bowed her head - maybe he had not dissolved all her fears and concerns. But he had soothed some of the darker voices that haunted her thoughts.
”But I must be going” Before her friend went about his daily duties and she missed the opportunity.
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Posted: Wed Oct 24, 2018 3:23 am
"Then let them call me a fool," Itiri shrugged. He might not have known her well, but if her natural state had been to be full of life, to have a vibrant personality and to be a conversationalist then he would much rather she went back to that state. If she wanted to change to something quieter and more reserved down the line, then his preference would be that she did it based on other circumstances rather than disquiet and uncertainty!
"But I have no need of thanks," he shook his head. "I should be thanking you for the candid words, you have given me much to consider and I..." he paused thoughtfully and smiled. "I hope others feel they can do the same, I would very much like to know how everyone views our current state of affairs," he admitted.
"Nevertheless, please feel free to take your leave," he waved a paw and cleared his throat. "It was not my intention to keep you so long, enjoy the rest of your day," he offered a warm smile as he gathered his own wits about him and considered where his next destination would be. So far meandering seemed to be working for him so he was inclined to go with that and see where life took him.
There were still plenty of hours in the day, he had time to find a few more lions to 'interrogate' with his queries! Z o m b i k ii Fin after Nyarai leaves? n_n
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