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Posted: Sat Sep 06, 2008 11:27 pm
Okay, so here's the thing. My mother left 6 months ago to go and live in Japan. She didn't give a reason, and she is still with my dad. We were really torn up about it coz she just walked out and stuff, and 3 weeks ago she came back and she's staying for two months but then shes going back to Japan and I'm really confused because I don't know when she's going to be here and when she's not. I don't know whether I should let her in because she's going to go away again and I don't want to get hurt like I did last time, but my dad seems so much happier now she's here. So I don't know what to think of my mother being here, I don't want to get close to her because she's going away again, but I know I'll miss her when she's gone. It seems like every time she smiles at me I wanna cry, it's really confusing and I don't know what to think anymore. I used to be really close to her and now it's just sad because I know there is so much she never told me, and I don't know what's real and what's not anymore. I don't think I can take it if she keeps coming and going like this because it's really hard to adjust every time and she doesn't even care that she leaves us behind as a mess. I just don't know what to do anymore, it's all way above my head.
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Posted: Sun Sep 07, 2008 1:53 pm
You REALLY need to tell her how you feel! Tell her to her face, write it down, tell her over the phone! Whichever is going to be easier for you. If I were you, and my mom was in and out like that, I would just be nice to her, but I dont think I would continue to hurt myself by getting close, and then being torn away.
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Posted: Wed Oct 08, 2008 4:27 pm
Why wouldn't she give a reason? If she's someone that you used to be close to, before she moved away, you have to ask her why she's doing this.
And definitely, DEFINITELY tell her how you feel.
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Posted: Sat Nov 08, 2008 1:31 am
Please share your feelings with her and family and friends.. expressing how you feel to people is a better idea than holding it in. it will help you in the long run. My boyfriend's mother left him when he was 9 (he's 18 now) and him and his family mainly kept their feelings to themselves. This in turn caused them all to have anger issues. She tried to come back into their lives last year. They don't let her into their lives because she caused them too much pain and not allowing her into their lives was the best thing to do in their situation. Your best bet is to talk to her and your father. Perhaps she did leave for a good reason and is coming back and had no intention of leaving you.. you'll never truly know til you talk to your family..
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Posted: Sun Nov 30, 2008 8:59 pm
I agree with everyone. If any of my family members were in and out of the house for no reason at all and in long intervals of time I'm sure I would collapse and spiral into depression -that's how much I love and depend on them- and for you not to be in the corner of your room, rocking yourself senseless I congratulate you on your mental ability.
Talk to your mum or tell her through a note with a gift. A good heart to heart conversation is needed. Ask why she won't tell you she's leaving and ask if she'll be back longer. That's all I can really think of as I've never been in this situation.
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