Teeth

• Artist: Bella Ayomide
• Description: This is the poem I wrote for the second round of VZN's Iron Poet contest. It's supposed to have a metaphor about wisdom teeth, as well as the words "extrapolate," "fervid" and "wherewithal."
  
  It's currently untitled, as I'm bad at titling things. Please leave comments and critiques in addition to voting.
• Date: 07/17/2008
• Tags: teeth freeverse relationships

We extrapolate that we needed these teeth, once.
We needed bones erupting through our gums,
needed to worry the sore spots with our tongue,
using all the fervid frustration of teenage masturbation.
We learned such sympathy for babies
and jealousy of unsexed virgins.

Our prehistoric parents had the wherewithal to endure
constant aches, the fortitude to keep on truckin'.
I am not so hardy.
I need my pink pills, popped every hour.
My lifestyle hasn't worn me down enough
to fit you in comfortably.
The pressure is doing a number on my health.

Even so, I argue with the doctor and my mother,
claiming,
I need you,
despite all evidence to the contrary.
I need the wisdom they all do without.
We thought it worth the pain, once.

Comments

[Mr Mark B]

Very weird lol I liked the "We needed bones erupting through our gums," line

[brittany bloom]

Um, I don't see the connection between any of this. Just because you use "big" words does not make any form of writing good- It's about content too- which you're lacking. 2/5

[CrystalBlue101]

I didnt even finish it all cause of all the big words i got tired but i can tell that it was very nice 4/5

[Xindane]

0.o, Strange.

[Astaire]

I like this piece much more than your pantoum. The imagery in the first stanza especially is very vivid. My only criticism is that I'm not quite sure what the teeth are acting as a metaphor for: perhaps a medicine or a person in your life? Or are you just talking about teeth, and being literal?