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It seemed that life would never pass us by.
What I would give for only one more day...
I would have never dreamed the morning light
Would come only to take my heart away.
We once danced by the lake on our bare feet,
And watched the fish and ducks come up for bread.
We spent our summer days out climbing trees.
At night I heard you echo through my head.
Yet never once had I stolen a kiss,
And never once had you taken my hand,
But I kept hoping that I would not miss
A whisper saying "Come my lovely and
I will make the stars to shine for you.
You ne'er need cry for I will hold you near,
And though the morning light may break us through
With all my love it ne'er will interfer."
Now I'm left with so much more to say,
But still the sunlight carries you away.
- Title: It seemed that life...
- Artist: Casca 7
- Description: tell me what you think. good or bad.
- Date: 07/16/2008
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Comments (7 Comments)
- Courgette - 07/18/2008
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Apart from the fact you CLEARLY need a hug *hugs* I love it!
If you're asking for constructive criticism, then here are some technical questions as I have no problems with the creative aspects. And I just got back from Europe and these are all I can think of in my jet-lagged state: - Report As Spam
- Crystalinemoon - 07/17/2008
- Thnx for the comment on my other peice ^^. I really like this one to your poetry brings up nice immages..it just flows...and some sad for me but trust me it hurts more when they leave you if you've held hands and all that other good stuff. wink
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- Casca 7 - 07/16/2008
- Thanks so much guys! If anyone has some criticism on how I might improve I'd love to hear that as well.
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- Rinlin813 - 07/16/2008
- I love this poem. It's beautiful!
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- Enigma Knight - 07/16/2008
- It truly paints a picture. I love it.
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- Cissia - 07/16/2008
- Okay, I LOVE this, totally relate, and the wording and EVERYTHING is so beautiful- going to the favorites, 5/5
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- CajunStrange - 07/16/2008
- It's awesome, deep, and not perfect....and that makes it perfect. I love it.
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