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The anticipation had peaked. They had finally kissed. Their foreheads brush cautiously together as their necks tilted outwards and their lips – somehow – managed to cross the divide; they touched. The momentary feeling of euphoria rushed between their soft lips. It made time stand still and for the briefest of seconds, they were one whole entity spiralling the second concentric circle of hell, where a world of no rights or wrongs existed.
As their lips pressed harder together in soft repose, He flinched. Reality had made its way back into his fleeting mind and He knew it was wrong. He broke the ethereal bond that bound their lips with the force of an empty gale which stocked him back into the real world.
He stood watching Him stare brazenly into eyes – as if to read his mind – and turned away. He wasn’t ready for this yet. He had to leave.
He left Him standing alone by the sea. He left Him with the gift of a fleeting feeling but a memory to cherish. The memory that turned Him bitter for the rest of his life.
- by TheMadWatcher |
- Fiction
- | Submitted on 04/02/2009 |
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- Title: Kissing in the Rain
- Artist: TheMadWatcher
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Description:
A short extract from a story I am writing. The characters are named this way because I am unable to come up with convincing names for them yet.
Let me know what you think and be constuctive in your critqué please :) - Date: 04/02/2009
- Tags: kissing rain
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Comments (4 Comments)
- PoisonousMoonlight - 08/07/2010
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Oh...that's interesting...I like it and it's so brief yet it's pretty long to describe one second. I like things that way, good job!
I like the sort of Poetic style you put at the end, because when something is important in a poem it's capitalized. Yeah and that helped a lot!
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- Hyper_Kid_2009 - 04/12/2009
- ok! its good
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- slave-4-u6969 - 04/08/2009
- ...okey dokey...You can always find names in books you read or something like that. That's what I did. I like this story a lot!!!
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- Hanamura Kana - 04/03/2009
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... Is he kissing a guy?
It sounds like they're gay, but i'm not to sure.
And i don't discriminate against gay's or lesbians.
Whole scene was well described, i liked it very much. smile
kana - Report As Spam