• Dumped
    There are two kinds of people in the world. Those who date and dump everyone and those that GET dumped by everyone. Well, there are also those who just don’t date at all whether it’s because they just can’t get a date or they are just a complete hermit crab that sits in the corner of their parents basement all day. I’m type number one. I’ll date all the guys every girl wants to date, dump them, gather my fame, bounce back with another guy and the cycle goes on. The point is, I would never get dumped. My name is Kelly Cramerman and this is my story of a girl who found love, lost love, hated love, still hated love but now had an addiction to chocolate ice cream and late night romance soap-operas, and finally took revenge upon love.
    It all started my junior year. I was what every 16 year old wish they could be. I lived in a perfect house, had the perfect designer wardrobe, a perfect brand new license and a brand new Porsche to go with it, and any guy at any time. Just imagine Paris Hilton only younger, happier, and no doubt prettier. That image now in your head, yeah, that’s me. Oh, and speaking of Paris, I have a second home over there, and a third in Milan. I think we have a fourth in Madrid but we haven’t been there in a while. Any ways, what I’m trying to get at is my life was as good as it could get.
    I was one of the most popular girls in the school. The only person in a higher social class than me was Brittney Marone. She was a senior and was currently dating Brad…and Jason, and Kevin, and is starting to get a “thing” going with Jackson. At least I had the decency to date only one guy at a time.
    I usually only dated a guy for a week, two tops. That was until I met Devin. We dated for a full 2 months and for me that is was past expectations. Our weekends were always dedicated to each other, every Sunday we would go have brunch in the park, and I was in absolute teen crazy love and I thought everything was going great…until I found out he was having a party and I, HIS GIRLFRIEND, wasn’t on the invite list. I couldn’t believe it. I got into my car and sped my way to his house, and blinded by my anger hit a car in the middle of a four way. My car was totaled, my arm and shoulder was sprained, and on top of that when I hit the car my head slammed into the horn leaving a gigantic blue bruise across my forehead. It was like someone painted my head to match my homecoming dress…only this didn’t cost $400. There I laid, in the hospital, thinking about what Devin was probably doing right now at his party, and right as I thought about him he walked in. “Yikes! Uh…you look great?” I already knew I looked hideous. Stupid boy. I gave him a smirk.
    “So, why are you here?” I asked him. I’m sure I looked angry to see him.
    He raised his eyebrow, “You’re mom called me and told me what happened. That doesn’t matter. What does is, why on Earth you were speeding like that?!”
    “Oh, I was just driving over to see you. You weren’t busy were you?” I tried not to sound sarcastic but it just popped out that way.
    He gulped, “ N..no…I was just watching the game. That’s all.”
    STRIKE ONE! “You didn’t have anyone over?” He wouldn’t even look at me. The first sign that a guy’s lying.
    “Well, I did have like three of four friends over but it was no big deal.”
    STRIKE TWO! “Only four? That seems pretty unusual for you.”
    “Well, there might have been more…”
    STRIKE THREE! “You little LIAR! I cannot believe I am lying here in a hospital bed and you are lying to me! I knew you had a party without me! Why didn’t you just tell me the truth?!”
    “Because I didn’t want to break it to you this way, Kelly!”
    The loud angry turned to silence. “Break what to me?”
    “Kelly…I found someone else.”
    No way. I couldn’t speak. I just stared at him…I’m pretty sure I even drooled a little. “Wait, so you’re breaking up…with ME?” He just nodded. I picked up the lamp next to me and chucked it at him. Unfortunately he is a really good athlete and managed to dodge it.
    “So, I’m guessing being friends isn’t gonna work out?”
    I glared at him. He got the message and walked out. I wanted to murder him, not literally but I was still mad. I was mature enough, though, to handle it in a healthy manner…I took every picture I had of him and stabbed them senselessly. For months I just sat in my room and ate…A LOT. I refused to go to school so my parents decided to hire a home school teacher. Plus I cried every night until I was finally all dried up. Then I realized, it was ridiculous for me to let that scum bag get the satisfaction of making my life miserable. I was determined to get revenge. I lost the extra pounds I gained, bought new clothes, and looked perfect again. A week later I went back to school. For three days I didn’t even see Devin. But then in the middle of the day I spotted him walking with his jockey friends and with his arm around, guess who, Brittney. I looked good that day and was confident so I strutted over to them. His jaw practically detached from his head.
    Brittney glared at me and said, “Oh, Kelly, I thought they sent you to rehab?” All of the guys “oohed” as if it was a super amazing diss.
    “Hmm. That’s interesting. Who ever told you that must have been almost as retarded as you, but there is no way anyone could be that much of a bimbo…then again you managed to be.” I flipped my hair and strutted over to my next class. I was back and everyone knew it.
    Over next few weeks I devised a plan. It was almost as flawless as me. I was going to destroy him. It was a three month plan, a month for each step.
    During the first month I planned to ruin his rep. One of the things that makes him so popular is the fact that he’s a jock. I had to get him off of the team. During his football teams final game I brought along a special friend of mine, Mr. Blow-horn. Both teams were tied. Devin had the ball so I stood up and yelled into the blow horn, “ Hey Devin,” he looked over, “do you still have a huge obsession with Care Bears?” Everyone burst into laughter. Devin got tackled and cost our school the game. His coach kicked him off the team and everyone in the school hated him. Phase one was complete!
    The next step was getting rid of Brittney Marone. I was sure that wasn't going to be hard, seeing how she was so stupid. I remembered what Devin did to me and figured that would work just fine. I invited everyone at our school except for Brittney to a pary supposedly hosted by Devin, then I got one of my friends to call Brittney asking if she should bring food to the party. Brittney exploded! She dumped him immediately. Phase two complete!
    It came time for phase three and I was on a roll. Everything was working out exactly how I planned. Then, though one of my friends told me someone caught Brittney crying her eyes out in the locker room two days after the break up. I had no clue what I did to her. She was going through the exact same thing as I did. I couldn’t have felt worse. In the beginning I was mad at myself for letting him take control of my life, but now I realized when I took revenge he was still in control of my life…just in a different way. I decided to not carry through with my plan. It took Brittney till the end of the year to warm up to me, and though we’re not the best of friends we’re still not rivals anymore. After everyone found out what happened between me and Devin everyone REALLY thought he was a jerk but I, my new and improved self, wasn’t satisfied by him being hated….well I must admit I was a little satisfied. “So, what happened to everyone?” you may be asking. Well Brittney is now in Community College and is on a “no boys” strike so she hasn’t dated anyone in a while. Devin graduated with no football scholarships and definitely no academic awards so he moved back to Wyoming with his Grandma. And Me, I’m in my senior year and I’m still dating, but nothing serious. Yes, I’ve dated a few more “Devins” but they would never last to long…and they lived happily ever after…well, not Devin.