• Chapter 5
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    “I’m not dead, you know.”

    “You ought to have been, after that. And you ought to be sleeping now.”

    Hitsugaya was holed up in the 4th Division’s most comfortable chamber. Unohana wasn’t angry anymore, but she was scolding. In that gentle way of hers, of course.

    “The only reason I’m allowing any of this is because of the emergency captain’s meeting. They’re doing this on my terms or not at all. Do you understand? If your condition destabilizes, the meeting is over, regardless.”

    He wanted to roll his eyes. Instead he just murmured a quiet “yes, ma’am” and leaned back against the pillows she had propped up behind him. Some things you just don’t argue with Unohana about. Like patient care, for example. Even if he himself was the patient.

    “All right then. You may come in.”

    The captains gathered around Hitsugaya’s bed. Like I really need this. Kyoraku is grinning. Kurotsuchi is calculating. The new guy – Amagai? – is nervous. And Yamamoto-dono looks like he’s about to order my execution.

    “Let me get straight to the point. She can’t stay here.”

    Boy, Yamamoto-dono can be blunt sometimes.

    “I don’t know what you think you were doing bringing her to Soul Society. Bad enough when the ryoka came on their own – upset the whole place, turning captain against captain, causing near disaster. But to invite one and escort her here? What were you thinking, Hitsugaya?”

    Unohana interrupted. “She can’t go back until her condition stabilizes. She wouldn’t survive the trip.”

    Hitsugaya wearily closed his eyes. “Besides, she has to be returned to the same night she left. Not that a little time twist is a problem, but she has a son to take care of and a husband with real problems and – “

    “As if her personal problems mattered here, Hitsugaya,” Yamamoto growled. “First she shows up unwelcomed and unannounced, generating an uproar we don’t need. Then she releases a dragon in Rukongai. Then I find one of my captains laid up at a critical time during our preparations for war. We don’t need this. Would you care to explain?”

    Hitsugaya looked over the assembled faces. Then he stared down at his hands. “I merely thought if we reunited the split part with the original souled body, there might be a way to suppress the outbursts. I didn’t expect what happened next.”

    Kyoraku’s grin was delighted. “You mean you didn’t expect a zanpakuto mating flight.”

    Hitsugaya’s face burned red. He stared at the wall. Of course he hadn’t expected that. Nor his feelings to be so… intense… nor his equal resolve to not indulge them.

    “She is a married woman in the living world with a family. I never expected her to stay. I wasn’t planning on asking for that. She wouldn’t want it anyway. She loves her son too much.”

    “You saved her life, you know. Had you not shielded her with your reiatsu, she would have probably been blown apart by the backlash.” Ukitake looked thoughtful. “I wonder if she in part wanted something like that.”

    “Don’t ever say that in my presence again.” The rest were startled by the vehemence in Hitsugaya’s voice.

    “Calm down already. We can still do some discreet research. She wouldn’t even have to come to the lab, just observe for unusual phenomena – “

    “NO, Kurotsuchi, and if I find you doing anything to her, anything at all, I’ll – “

    “You will what, Hitsugaya-taichou?” The emphasis was all too clear in Kuchiki’s response. “You will do what? Interfere in the domain of another captain? Avenge her? What did you have in mind?”

    “I have in mind training her.”

    The assembled captains hadn’t expected that. Hitsugaya didn’t know it was coming either. It just… came out of his mouth.

    “I have in mind finding a way to teach her to control her dragon. It has a name, you know. Oshidamaru. She has a name, just as Hyourinmaru has a name. Even if it took meeting Hyourinmaru for her to learn it. Can you believe, Sharon has known about this… otherness… inside for years, and gave her a form of her own choosing? And because her own strengths and weakness lie in the realm of emotions, it was emotional extreme that gave Oshidamaru the power to seek help – here, in Soul Society, where she found someone who could understand. Another dragon. A complementary dragon.”

    “You mean, a mate.” Komamura understood. “The dragon found her mate in the only place she could.”

    “She’s still a hazard.” Soi Fon wasn’t quite scowling, but it sure was close. “She is a security risk whether she is here in Soul Society or in the living world. We can’t afford to let her run around loose with power like that free for the taking. It would be far too easy for Aizen to decide he wanted a dragon on his side and simply take her or worse, convince her that it would be in her ‘best interests’ to join him.” She almost snorted. “Far too easy if she already has a death wish.”

    Hitsugaya went white. That particular possibility had not occurred to him. He had at best hoped they would deliver her back and perhaps let him visit her, teach her a little. He hadn’t thought about what would happen if Aizen found out where the indigo dragon who had announced herself so thoroughly to all Soul Society was hiding.

    “So teach her to fight.” Zaraki was blunt as always. “Teach her to defend by attacking. Show her how to grow stronger. Tell her what is at stake.”

    “She still thinks I’m a figment of her imagination.” Hitsugaya let out a long sigh. “If she remembers anything at all about this little side trip to Soul Society, she’s likely to think it was a particularly vivid dream.” Even the kiss. I hope I was able to give her that much.

    “Um, well, I think that’s not such a bad idea,” Amagai said. “At least as far as Aizen is concerned. If she doesn’t believe he exists, then she won’t go to him voluntarily, yes? So we keep her thinking it’s all some dream. Hopefully a nice dream that she wants to come back. And in the meanwhile, Hitsugaya-taichou can help her gain some control over her dragon. He does have personal experience with that, after all. We can’t let her dragon run free, can we?” He smiled helpfully at Hitsugaya.

    Hitsugaya shot him a grateful look. “Oshidamaru has a mind of her own, and right now, Sharon is in no state to confront her much less control her. She hasn’t the physical, psychological, or emotional resources at her disposal, nor the knowledge even if she had.”

    “I suspect Oshidamaru has high incentive for returning to Soul Society all on her own if not restrained, however. And that could cause trouble.” Kyoraku was only partially successful in blocking a wicked grin.

    Damn him… Hitsugaya’s face was hot again. “I told you, she is a married woman. As in any, um, well, anything that could happen because of the dragons, well, can’t. Won’t. Even if she believed, and well, she doesn’t, and – “

    “You can stop stammering now, Hitsugaya.” Yamamoto replied drily. “You have made your point. And your argument. The woman will be returned to the living world as soon as feasible, and it will be your responsibility to see to it that she is trained sufficiently to prevent any further disruption in either world. You have the resources of Soul Society at your disposal, with the single caveat that insofar as much as possible, you preserve her illusion that we don’t exist – and that includes not bringing her back here. We don’t need another fireworks display like the last one.”

    The thought, unbidden, chased across Hitsugaya’s mind as his cheeks burned deeper red. As long as she doesn’t think I’m real, she will still give herself permission to love me. It will be exceedingly difficult to train her while denying what I feel for her. Especially since our dragons have made it clear their feelings are mutual.

    “In that case, the meeting is dismissed. Get some rest, Hitsugaya. It looks like you’re going to need it.”

    Yamamoto and the other captains filed out, Kyoraku flashing him another grin, this time undisguisedly wicked, and Amagai sending him a sympathetic half smile. Unohana shooed them all out, again taking control of her patient. “You could be a little less hard on yourself, you know,” she said. “It’s not as if you invited a dragon to come keep Hyourinmaru company. There is no possible way you could have known what would result when you brought her here.”

    Hitsugaya still couldn’t look her in the face. He stared fixedly at the wall, willing his cheeks to cool down. “I know that. That doesn’t help me figure out what to do next, though, does it?” He tried not to let a slight edge of bitterness creep into his voice. Finally, finally, someone to love, as an equal, as a woman, not just a childhood friend or comrade. Someone who obviously loved him back. And he was not only bound not to do anything about it, he was obliged to perpetuate the circumstance that had made it possible. And all the while he was supposed to train her, which would mean seeing her again and again. Damn it all. Damn it all. This just wasn’t fair. Not for either of them, and certainly not for the dragons. She hadn’t even been fully conscious during the mating flight – if the dragons took it upon themselves to do something while in the living world, he didn’t think he would be able to hide how he felt. And she felt the same way. And they just couldn’t do anything about it. He wasn’t even sure it would be safe to touch her, because he would be tempted to kiss her again. Damn. It. All. Why did this have to happen to him?